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...just laugh at every joke. Shine your teeth til it's meaningless and cover them with lies."

I'm definitely getting sick and tired of all my male friends. Or, should I say male friend who want to get laid. I can't talk to any guy around here without being interupted by some asshole making a lame pass at me. Nothing really sexual...but they try and snuggle up to me and it makes my heart flip over and my stomach tighten. I always feel like I might vomit when they do that. We're friends, not lovers I don't know why they don't understand that. And it's pretty lame when you have to use someone else's pain to try and get some. Just pitiful.

It's hard to because I don't really get along with chicks very well. In general, I'm too sarcastic and blatant for them. *sigh* I have afew good friends at home and one in particular (who is actually a guy) who have helped me through this.No one else around this shithole college cares. Ouch. Yes...that's my heart you just stabbed.

I've been listening to a lot of Wilco lately. They are another band who's lyricist is definitely a poet. Jeff Tweedy's writing style is amazing. While the majority of their songs are depressing love songs, they are original and creative as hell. That's what I wanna do...write love poems that are actually creative. It's hard...

"God grant me distraction."

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The following comments are for ""How you fight the lonliness..."
by Darkshine Raven

I sort of know what you're going through. Ever since I can remember I've gotten along better with guys than with girls, but for me, it's mostly because I'm not into the designer brand shopping or excessive makeup or low tops or what-have-you.

I guess the best thing to do would be to tell them to back off, to say exactly what you're feeling, that you're friends, not lovers or anything. I know it's easier said than done, but I think once it's done you'll have an easier time of it. And if they don't listen to you, then why do you want to be near them if they don't respect you?

I know it's easy for me to say this since I'm not going through that. Actually, my problem is that I can't get my guy friends to respect me that way! They just treat me like a kid sister and tease me all the time. But that's beside the point.

I hope I helped (though I have a nagging suspicion that I didn't), and I hope things get better for you- it would be a pity if this ended up breaking your friendship, though I don't think that will happen. Just don't be afraid to be a shrew- it's quite rewarding :)

( Posted by: Lily [Member] On: November 24, 2003 )

Tell 'em
"We're friends, not lovers I don't know why they don't understand that."

Yeah, I don't get it, either.

I got crap like that all the time. Ended for awhile after I met Mr. Calm, then started up again when I worked for a while outside the house. Hugging me, stuff like that, and it didn't matter that I did nothing to encourage it (or that I'm wearing a wedding ring). Maybe it's because I'm older, but I had no trouble making it clear that that kind of behavior was out of bounds. It doesn't matter who it's coming from; if it makes you uncomfortable, say something. I know it's easier said than done-- confrontation is not a good pal of mine-- but if you don't, then they won't stop. And I'm sure you can differentiate between the guys who are true pals and the ones who're just looking to take advantage of you.

I think I echoed a lot of what Lily said.

( Posted by: Elphaba [Member] On: November 24, 2003 )

prefer to know
Remember,we might be smart in some ways, but some signals just fly right by us.
"Like it's great we're just freinds (insert name) cause i don't find anything attractive about you either."
you know subtle, you're a writer, creative, you can think of something
or if they're bugging ya - just ignore them or imagine you have penelope's strength!!!
i don't think anyone has the right to invade your space or touch you so do like Alexakis says -/ in the family jewels.

( Posted by: Smithy [Member] On: November 25, 2003 )

DS: Tell your male buddies to respect you. As long as you accept what they say to you, they will continue on doing just that. maybe, not intentionally, but still, that is dis-respectful. A true friend is someone who wants you to listen to their problems, and yours, and have a civil, fun, interesting, etc., conversation. I remeber in my late 20's guys will make sluggish remarks toward me, I had to put them in their place right then and there. they started showing respect for me.Some friends, think just because you are friends, they have the right to say anything to you, oh no! I don't think so. Just put your feet down to them, they will respect you morer or get lost. true friends will stay around for an lending ear.



( Posted by: JEANNIE45 [Member] On: November 28, 2003 )

Wow, this post got a lot more response than I ever expected it to. Thank you guys for standing by me. I definitely make the guys in my life respect me, I just feel really shitty I realize the main reason they involve themselves with me is because they wanna get some. It's just lonely. You have guys all have alot of good advice though. I guess I just love having male "pals" but right now alot of them are turning into lust-crazed jerks. It just hurts my feelings...I'm oversensitive like that though.

Thanks all of you. =D

( Posted by: Darkshine Raven [Member] On: November 29, 2003 )

How to fight the loneliness..
Reads very real with some very fine and beautiful observations on urban life.

( Posted by: Handshake [Member] On: December 23, 2003 )

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