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Morning Mirror

Eyes a smutty smear
with secrets savoring from sleep
Mouth a full-blown
rose made for kisses dark and deep
Nose scenting phantom
fragrance, sandalwood by name
Tumbled sable tangle
that a hairbrush fails to tame
Each skin cell a-tingle
enervate entire body
Coaxed from slumber rife with sweet
and hot and naughty
Gazing into glass
try to gentle down the mane
Ah! the seething
evidence: Iíve dreamed of you again.




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The following comments are for "Morning Mirror"
by cybele

like it!
This is really an engaging, charming piece. Only one thing I question, your use of the word 'enervate'; not only does it interfere with the lively rhythm of the piece, it literally means 'to sap or deplete energy, to drain vigor' which directly contradicts the meanings of the rest of your lines - you might have meant 'energize,' which means the opposite -

The last four lines are exquisite, and the run-on in the next-to-last line elevates this poem into song -

Keep this stuff up!

( Posted by: johnlibertus [Member] On: November 17, 2003 )

john, how right you are
I meant "exhilarate" or maybe "energize" and unconsciously mushed them together. Now I can't figure out how to edit this post in order to fix it...grrr. Thanks for bringing it to my attention.

c

( Posted by: Cybele [Member] On: December 1, 2003 )





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