Lit.Org - a community for readers and writers Advanced Search
 




Average Rating
10

(1 votes)


RatingRated by
10MaxiiJ

You must login to vote


Stillness erupts...

Enchanted lake where a ripple seldom disturbs the mirror surface

Pits deep enough to imprison fire-breathing dragons,

and shadows that seem darker and deeper than an endless abyss

Undisturbed until cleft open and cataclysmic eruption occurs

then volcanic fissure after fissure spews out it's larva

and thundering storm rips through the pregnant sky

My landscape of moods is inexplicably changed

Standing with nostrils straining wide, swallowing the wind

as the dying light of day casts shadows on the altered scene

In change, behold I am made new...



------
Open wide the eyes of the mind.
Chanti


Related Items

Comments

The following comments are for "Chanti"
by Chanti

change of scene
This poem, for all its dramatic language, doesn't seem to be saying anything. Strip it to its barest terms, and you'll see what I mean.

By the way, a volcano spews out 'lava,' not 'larva' -

( Posted by: johnlibertus [Member] On: November 11, 2003 )

Great! Typo or no...
Yes, there was a typo, but otherwise I thought it was great. Many times, in my life, I have had an epiphony that seemed to rend my being in half as violently as this poem describes, and I became a totally new creature. I appreciated knowing someone else has been there and I think it happens to everyone who manages to mature. (I see not all people do make that journey successfully!)

( Posted by: MaxiiJ [Member] On: May 2, 2004 )

Silence Erupts
John,
I am sorry that you found little meaning in the poem but this is not entirely unexpected. The entire work is a metaphor and it seems that whilst you didn't pick up what I was trying to say Maxii did and was able to relate. I guess poetry will always be subjective and what works for one will not work for another. Thank you anyway for the time you took to reply.

Maxii, It is always so good to know that someone has looked beyond the words to the meaning beneath and ironically this is a lot about what this poem is about. The 'still lake' denotes what is on the surface. The 'pits deep enough to imprison fire-breathing dragons' refers to concealed passion (maybe anger?) and the shadows are those dark places within us all that we do not reveal to the world (our secrets, hopes and dreams maybe). The cataclysmic event in my case was a rape and yes all the emotion of that time was expressed in my words.

Interesting that my typo *larva could in fact work in an abstract sense. In eruption there is also the potential for new growth (larva) and it is not always just about the hot stuff.
Thanks for taking such an interest and relating to me your own experience of this. I am deeply touched.
Chanti

PS: If either one of you would like to see the poem printed as it was on a background in my own group together with a whole lot more critique, please check out this link:

http://groups.msn.com/LastingImpressions/foodtravel.msnw?action=get_message&mview=0&ID_Message=13147&LastModified=4675469997045179973&all_topics=1

( Posted by: Ellipsesdots [Member] On: May 3, 2004 )





Add Your Comment

You Must be a member to post comments and ratings. If you are NOT already a member, signup now it only takes a few seconds!

All Fields are required

Commenting Guidelines:
  • All comments must be about the writing. Non-related comments will be deleted.
  • Flaming, derogatory or messages attacking other members well be deleted.
  • Adult/Sexual comments or messages will be deleted.
  • All subjects MUST be PG. No cursing in subjects.
  • All comments must follow the sites posting guidelines.
The purpose of commenting on Lit.Org is to help writers improve their writing. Please post constructive feedback to help the author improve their work.


Username:
Password:
Subject:
Comment:





Login:
Password: