Lit.Org - a community for readers and writers Advanced Search

Average Rating

(1 votes)

RatingRated by

You must login to vote

Parable of Sin and a Savior
By Micah Watkins

A man and his girlfriend drove by the forest on a dark December evening along a deserted stretch of highway. The roads were icy and the vision was all but clear, for a blizzard was howling and throwing snow down faster than any of them could predict. But in the woods they drove by, a dark, shadowing figure lurked, hunting its unsuspecting prey, waiting for the right moment.

It was the lust and the fear, which fed the beast; these things it could smell and taste from miles away. Like any hungry animal, it knew the smell was just the beginning of the feast. So, it crawled and clawed closer and closer to the moving car, and it's unsuspecting dinner. The thing saw only body heat, so the blizzard was not a problem for the strong and muscular hunter.

It drew closer and closer, quieter and quieter, until all anything knew, it was only a shadow, not to be see by the human eye. It saw that ahead of the couple was a huge snow bank, blocking the road, and it knew that would be the perfect dinner table.

The two humans drove silently through the storm and around the bend in the road. The blizzard was getting worse and the car was becoming unsteady. Suddenly, without warning they it something soft and white and the wind swung the tail of the car into the snow bank, as well.

The male looked at the female in dry lust, for she was a beautiful thing, but what he did not see was what was inside her heart, for he only saw what was on the outside of her flesh. So, he started to make his move, as did the creature that stalked them.

"Clank, clank, clank, clank" went the things claws on the roof. The straining of steal soon followed as the creature pealed away the roof of the car, but only the woman saw, and quickly cried a cry for help for both of them.

Up on a lofty mountaintop in full view of the scene bellow, a brilliant white dragon stood perched on his rest. It heard the cry a savior and spread its wings and leapt off the cliff, bringing a helicopter with it as the blizzard suddenly stopped.

Invisible in the whiteness that covered the forest the hero and helicopter speed quickly down the mountain and toward the trapped car. But, suddenly the helicopter stopped and turned around, leaving the dragon to save the day.

The drooling creature brought up a giant claw and was about to slice the car and it's occupants into tiny pieces for it's evening meal, when suddenly it was gone from view as the dragon slammed into it as full speed, knocking it off the car and into the fragile snow bank on the cliff that wasn't to car away.

The thing sprang back to it's feat and leapt toward its opposed, who merely stepped out of the way, sending it crashing into a tree. Suddenly, the sharp cold sting of dragons jaws clamping onto it's neck, and the cold trickle of blood was felt be the evil beast that had hunted, and now was dead.

The dragon turned toward the car and picked it up gently, as it gripped the beast by it's throat. The majestic white dragon dropped the thing bye it's lair, then flew down to the road and placed the couple on the side of the road that past by the mountain that was it's home. That is were the rescue crews found them, without a scratch, and with little but a cold. When asked what had happened to their car, the woman just smiled and said, "We had a savior."


The following comments are for "Parable of Sin and a Savior"
by Winged Warrior

Except for a few gramatical errors, that was really good. Very interesting.

( Posted by: Kittlethe1 [Member] On: September 8, 2001 )

I can really relate to this story. Great job of setting the mood in the beginning, and great description. I felt like I was there.

( Posted by: philliephan2k2 [Member] On: October 3, 2001 )

Add Your Comment

You Must be a member to post comments and ratings. If you are NOT already a member, signup now it only takes a few seconds!

All Fields are required

Commenting Guidelines:
  • All comments must be about the writing. Non-related comments will be deleted.
  • Flaming, derogatory or messages attacking other members well be deleted.
  • Adult/Sexual comments or messages will be deleted.
  • All subjects MUST be PG. No cursing in subjects.
  • All comments must follow the sites posting guidelines.
The purpose of commenting on Lit.Org is to help writers improve their writing. Please post constructive feedback to help the author improve their work.