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All I hunger for
Is to have the taste of you
Inside of my mouth

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The following comments are for "XVII"
by TrueGenius

Too short
I think this is too short for a poem, really. Though, if you changed the syllable structure and shortened it a little more, it would make a decent haiku.

Also, how does the title link in with the actual poem?

( Posted by: False Dawn [Member] On: July 27, 2003 )

Should pay attention
lol, my mistake. Forget I mentioned it then :)

( Posted by: False Dawn [Member] On: July 27, 2003 )

Make's me think of many good times.
Good work.

( Posted by: nebulaplasma [Member] On: July 28, 2003 )

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