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Mother
Father
your seed
pullulated
despite
stygian
earth
a seed
transfused
children into
grandchildren
the quintessence
of your
love

------
"Some people never go crazy. What truly horrible lives they must lead." Charles Bukowski


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The following comments are for "Distillation of lives"
by pablowilliams

despite stygian earth
Hope you're not putting this to music cos pullulated is such a hard word to say or rhyme. For my lazy tongue anyway.

I like the all encompassing nature of your brief verse but I remember when you used to write more. And by that I don't mean often; you just used to be more verbose. While this current style suits you, I miss the other one.

Sometimes leaving poems intact is better and more honest. Whittling words away leaves empty holes. I always say, just be the person who writes how he feels - much like the person who posted your most recent comments - not someone influenced into minimalism.

(You know that's not meant as an insult. Or I hope you do.)

But that's just my opinion and everyone disagrees with me.

( Posted by: toscano [Member] On: April 28, 2015 )

Moved
I'm always looking for your glances, my good Man. Your comments here are appreciated.

I'm always torn between the two. When I sit down to siphon my convoluted renderings, I seem to concern myself, first and foremost, with how it is going to read on paper. I neglect that initial spark; that gust of wind, as it were, that got me to sit in my chair in the first place. I'm always moved by my own romanticism to the thing- then I lose it. Sometimes.

Anyway, your observation, is spot on. I enjoy "less is more" readings; but I wish I could hone the better part of that into more of a figure that moves and screams passion, not only for the reader, but also for my soul.



( Posted by: pablowilliams [Member] On: April 29, 2015 )

Love Is A Hoe
There's a reason women keep the seeds...
And man...
the watering can

( Posted by: awhippingflame [Member] On: May 1, 2015 )





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