Red Ranger
by williamhill (Member) - published: April 6, 2012
Word Count: 130 Word Bytes: 835 Viewed: 336 times
Category - Poetry
© Copyright by williamhill

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I caught myself at the cattle guard
before the rain hit
hard
and soaked my cell phone
offenders you, come across
you unaware,of wrath deep inside
my intent tonight, a trickle of retribution
gallwashed in me

But He caught me up on the way to my plot
ruined my plan with tears
asked Him for an answer on the way
to my week

He gave and still I war with me
over loss

I always thought getting even playing poker was a worthy goal when far behind
cut my losses and I go home ahead. Get it?

But there is no getting even with man or God
Not on paper or person
Neither blood nor ink will
wash away those who
killed my dog

It was all my fault anyway.

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Comments

The following comments are for "Red Ranger"
by williamhill

Red Ranger
Very poignant Charlie...hope this really wasn't about losing your dog.

If so...my condolences...have lost two of them myself over the years, and it never gets old!

Bea

( Posted by: Beatrice Boyle [Member] On: April 6, 2012 )

Bea
It really is. More about it later.

Thanks, charlie.

( Posted by: williamhill [Member] On: April 6, 2012 )

gallwashed
What a wonderful turn of phrase. I can feel it and it works better than the bile rising. I'll probably borrow that sometime in the future.

I read this with abandon other than the lines about on your way to your week which I parlayed into the way of your week which means something slightly different so it probably wouldn't fly.

Last line is a clincher ... took me back to the guilt I felt about putting my first Siamese in harms way ... still feel pangs about that cause she was such a pistol.

( Posted by: Pen [Member] On: April 7, 2012 )

stuck with you
I think it very interesting, and if it pertains to grief then for sure we all grieve in solitude....

Lines 4, 5, 6 are a bit of a speed bump for me. Maybe it is the punctuation... seems like too many "you" in the lines, or maybe commas.....

Other than that it does hit a nerve in the end

Bw

( Posted by: BWOz [Member] On: April 22, 2012 )

time for red
good stuff..

real is best

( Posted by: Bobby7L [Member] On: April 23, 2012 )

always good to read your stuff
Enjoyed it. Hard and real. Good stuff. Thanks for posting.

Sorry about your dog.

( Posted by: andyhavens [Member] On: May 5, 2012 )

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