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Feel
A Short Story by G.S.Vasu Kumar


Akash was the only son to his caring and loving parents, who were both blind, and they saw the world through his eyes. They thought that he would be there for them when they grew old, and needed him the most. He transformed into a handsome young man as the time flew.

The parents started searching for a suitable bride for their son. However, he kept rejecting the proposals which they brought for him.

“Son, let us know, what kind of girl you have in mind?” His father asked him, “So that we can find her.”

“Dad, please don’t worry about it,” He replied,
“I’ll find her someday and bring her home.”

“All right, son.” His father said.

One day, Akash brought home a young beautiful girl and introduced them to her.

“Father, mother, here is your would be daughter-in-law!” He said.

His mother felt her face with her fingers and had a smile on her face. His father repeated the same process and smiled too. But the girl wasn’t pleased.

“What nonsense?” She cried, “You didn’t tell me that your parents were blind?” She asked giving an annoyed glare at her husband, Akash.

“Sweetheart, what difference would it make by you knowing it in advance. You are going to marry me, not them.” He said.

“I can’t be their servant for the rest of my life, you moron!” She cried, stamping his feet with hers.

“Ouch!” He cried in pain.

“I want you to send them away to some blind age home.” She said.

“Darling, there is nothing by that name.”

“Well, to some place where people like your parents stay.”

“We can think about it later.”

“No later business,” She said firmly, “If you want to marry and stay with me then you need to do it. If not, you can forget me.” She added leaving the place.

His parents had become almost speechless listening to their conversation.

“Son, what’s going on?” His father asked him.

“Would you send us away to the so called “Blind Age Home”, son?” His mother asked.

“Nothing, dad” He said, “She just can’t stand physically handicapped people. Mom, it is always better to stay with people like you. You would be able to understand each other better.”

After some time, they both got married and his parents got shifted to the old age home. Akash’s wife became pregnant and later, was admitted in a hospital for delivery.

“I have some good news and some bad news,” The nurse came and informed him.

“Is my wife all right?” Akash asked her.

“She is fine!” The nurse said.

“Then what could be the bad news be?” He asked.

“Well, she has given birth to a baby boy, but sadly he is born blind!” She said, “You can go and see them.”

Akash was shocked by what he had just heard. He walked silently towards the ward.

“I hate you!” His wife cried as soon as he entered the ward.

“Darling…”

“Shut up!” She cried interrupting him, “I
shouldn’t have married you in the first place. Now see what has happened.”

Mohan woke up with a sudden jerk.

“What happen? Did you have a bad dream or something?” His wife asked.

“Yes, the dream seemed so real and scary.”

“What did you see in your dream?”

“We both were blind in the dream. Our son, Akash got married to a girl who didn’t like us, and she sent us away to old age home. Later, she gave birth to a blind boy.”

“Thank God, it’s just a dream” She said with a sigh.

“What if this dream comes true?” He asked.

“Don’t you worry,” She said, “Dreams are only dreams, and they seldom come true. Now, go back to sleep.”

Next day, Akash brought home the girl whom he loved and wished to get married. He introduced her to his parents. She bowed down and touched their feet, seeking their blessing. His mother raised her up, felt her face with her fingers.

“How I wish I could see both of you together!” She said kissing on her forehead.

“Tell me, how does our son look like? Is he handsome?” She asked.

“Aunty, I can’t see him with my eyes,” She replied, “However, I have seen him through the eyes of my heart, and he is a wonderful person. I feel so lucky to get a person like him.”

“Are you also…?”

“Yes, aunty, I was born blind. I can only feel things, not see. I started seeing the beauty of this world through your son’s eyes.” She replied.

The End












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http://gsvasukumar.blogspot.com/


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Comments

The following comments are for "Feel"
by G.S.VASUKUMAR

Feel
This has a feel of another culture. Something beyond the usual American/European Union writing that we mostly see here on Lit. I really dig it. This is a good story with a good moral. Allow me a note or two:

You've done really well with the basic's but this one needs some editing. The biggest glitch I see is at the end when the parents wake up, you've given the impression that their blindness is only a dream, yet when they meet the girl who will marry Akash, you portrayed the parents as blind again. That definitely needs some clarification. I also don't get why the girl is calling the mom "Aunty" is this a cultural thing? Needs some clarification as well.

I really like this story, and I hope you'll continue to work on it and get it ready for submission!

Please take my comments in the spirit they are intended, just the friendly observations of one writer to another. Feel free to disregard, after all, it's your story and you should write it how you want! ;)

Much Love,

Dave

( Posted by: HeRoCoMpLeX [Member] On: February 23, 2012 )

Feel
Hi! Dave,

Thanks a lot for your nice comments on the story. This story is based on Indian culture, so it is entirely different from the usual American/European Union writing that we mostly see here on Lit.

I am removing the glitch which you have pointed in your review.

Regarding, the girl calling his mom "Aunty" is fine over here. She could even call "Mom" as well. I would change that too :)

I have taken your comments in the right spirit :)

As I won't be able to edit the post, so I have to re-submit the same.

Best Regards,
Vasu

( Posted by: G.S.VASUKUMAR [Member] On: February 23, 2012 )





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