Lit.Org - a community for readers and writers Advanced Search
 




Average Rating
0.00

(0 votes)

You must login to vote

Summer was ending and I was attending a party in an apartment on East 2nd street owned by a friend of a friend of a very close friend of mine. The afternoon was very cordial and ever so drunken and little by little the party slowly drifted up to the roof. Everyone was happy and laughing and elbow to elbow below the reddening sky. But I was becoming a little nervous because as I edged closer I noticed there was no railing around the roof. Then, suddenly, I was shocked to see a long lost love of mine heading straight for me through the throng. Her name was Caroline and she was beautiful and I was still ashamed of the way I had mistreated her. Without a word Caroline looked me straight in the eye and removed a scissors from her purse. Then slowly and carefully she cut the pocket off my J. Hilburn shirt and brandished the little patch of cloth above her head. A silence feel upon the gathering when she said, “This is John’s heart.” Then Caroline stepped to the edge of the roof an let go the patch and we watched as it slowly drifted to the street.


Related Items

Comments

The following comments are for "The Party."
by johnjohndoe

John's heart
Succinct. And visually expansive. Loved it.

( Posted by: toscano [Member] On: September 29, 2011 )

The Party
This piece has a run-on feeling that I love. Like the narrator is nervous and rushing through the story with his heart a flutter. A good job building the suspense. Short, sweet, and to the point. Very cool!

Much Love,

Dave

( Posted by: HeRoCoMpLeX [Member] On: October 3, 2011 )

Like
Liked this a lot. Succinct, punchy and makes the reader want more.

( Posted by: C.Lynagh [Member] On: October 21, 2011 )





Add Your Comment

You Must be a member to post comments and ratings. If you are NOT already a member, signup now it only takes a few seconds!

All Fields are required

Commenting Guidelines:
  • All comments must be about the writing. Non-related comments will be deleted.
  • Flaming, derogatory or messages attacking other members well be deleted.
  • Adult/Sexual comments or messages will be deleted.
  • All subjects MUST be PG. No cursing in subjects.
  • All comments must follow the sites posting guidelines.
The purpose of commenting on Lit.Org is to help writers improve their writing. Please post constructive feedback to help the author improve their work.


Username:
Password:
Subject:
Comment:





Login:
Password: