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Nothing sucks more than not knowing who you are.
Looking in the mirror and seeing a face
That's not the one that should be there.
Not knowing where you stand,
Not knowing which direction to start towards.
There is no compass for me, no North.
I know less of myself than I know a random whore.
A candle flickers on the table beside me
But it doesn't put out any light.

Don't know why people piss me off.
Don't know why I anger myself.
Not a clue where I go next.

Life's a blank slate and it's just gonna stay blank.

Can't figure out why I can't sleep,
Can't understand why I can't simply weep.
I don't know shit, don't know what's in store.
Nothing but that pisses me off more.

I watch my TV life, now it's cancelled.
No new insights, no new plot.
Same bullshit forever, just a different week.

Something twists inside of me
But I can't smooth it down.
I can't afford to pay attention.

Life seems like a cruel joke, but the punchline falls flat.
Given all this potential, then life just takes it back.
Don't know where my life is.
Don't know how to get it back.
Thought that I knew the way but I lost that fucking map.

The girl who I used to be is dead.
Buried in a cheap unmarked grave.
I don't take her flowers, she won't resurrect.
Just take another pill sweetie, it'll make you forget.
Or have another cigarette, another vodka shot.

I'm tired of the shitty hand I've been dealt.
It looks great at first, but the deeper you go
The more fucked up and twisted it gets.

I used to have a list of things
That I could accomplish,
A real life to do.
But I screwed it all up, so fuck you
Goodbye, I'm through.

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The following comments are for "Curveball (explicit)"
by serenastargazr

Sometimes I Scare Myself
The face in the mirror is haunting
When we live a ghostly life

( Posted by: awhippingflame [Member] On: September 27, 2011 )

ya know what?
I got less than half way through and ... well .. you just didn't hold my attention ... heard/read it all before ... and it's tiresome.

( Posted by: Pen [Member] On: September 28, 2011 )

Some people...
have heard and read it all before but, not having lived it they have no clue.
Drinks anyone?

( Posted by: damifino [Member] On: October 5, 2011 )

Thanks damifino for the save... I would love that drink! Glad someone got it : )

( Posted by: serenastargazr [Member] On: October 24, 2011 )

knitting or candle making?
Yeh, my girl friend tried everything, she is into knitting this week.

( Posted by: veebdosa [Member] On: October 25, 2011 )

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