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My home is my castle that’s what I'm told
why should I move now I have gotten old
Neighbours are perfect grass is pure green
can always boast about the places I’ve been
My home is so perfect but bills are a pain
the end of the month it’s always the same
Chauffer the gardener the cook who is funny
they all loiter round me looking for money
My home is so handy it’s just down the street
the Pub and the Chemist Shop right at my feet
I still take the car because walking’s a chore
then to go any further would be such a bore
My home is perfect for it has all that I need
A bedroom a kitchen and somewhere to feed
Living room so comfy I get stuck in the chair
but now I am old why would anyone care
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If you listen to me long enough I can lower your IQ
I came into this world with nothing,
through careful management I've got most of it left.
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