Lit.Org - a community for readers and writers Advanced Search

Average Rating

(0 votes)

You must login to vote

the salty scent
of your skin lingers
thick and heavy
on my tongue

iím lost now
a zephyr
set free

i try to look
into the future
with failing sight

my eight ball gives
cryptic answers
unless quizzed
about the past

memory sets in
ever the enemy
of blissful ignorance

i canít forget
the curves
of your body

a masterpiece
i once painted
with the tips
Of my fingers

David Moore
July 24, 2011

'But I don't want to go among mad people,' said Alice. 'Oh, you can't help that,' said the cat. 'We're all mad here.'
Lewis Carroll

Related Items


The following comments are for "Magic Eight Ball"
by HeRoCoMpLeX

Oh Dave!
Oh David...didn't know you were an artist...well done!

Interesting...are you an impressionist (my thought) or a modernist???? lol


( Posted by: Beatrice Boyle [Member] On: July 30, 2011 )

Thanks for the read Aunt Bea. As to me being an artist...I'm not even that good at drawing stick figures and smiley faces, much less painting. No, its just a metaphor. LOL, I wish I had some artistic talent, but alas, my talents lay elsewhere.

I've another poem up on the front page that post a couple of days ago, I was hoping you'd give it a gander and tell me what you think!

Much Love,


( Posted by: HeRoCoMpLeX [Member] On: July 30, 2011 )

of strokes and musings
good stuff

My suggestions would be to lead stanza three with:

with failing sight
I try to see
into our future


a masterpiece
once painted
with the tips
of my fingers

[clipping "i" in l2]


( Posted by: Bobby7L [Member] On: July 31, 2011 )

Add Your Comment

You Must be a member to post comments and ratings. If you are NOT already a member, signup now it only takes a few seconds!

All Fields are required

Commenting Guidelines:
  • All comments must be about the writing. Non-related comments will be deleted.
  • Flaming, derogatory or messages attacking other members well be deleted.
  • Adult/Sexual comments or messages will be deleted.
  • All subjects MUST be PG. No cursing in subjects.
  • All comments must follow the sites posting guidelines.
The purpose of commenting on Lit.Org is to help writers improve their writing. Please post constructive feedback to help the author improve their work.