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everyone says God never gives you more than you can handle
kicks you in the teeth when your down
i don't know
i must still be standing
to stupid or out of it to fall
i can't handle any more
my feet are on the ground
i keep struggling on
walking into one wall or another
no guidance,lighting the path
only doing what's right
I surrender
my heart wails out to you
i don't know
what do want from me?
love? when have i not
faith? when has it stopped
believing? when have i failed
knowing? your with me every momment
i learn from every mistake
i don't know
how much longer i can hold up
my feet are on the ground
i can't handle any more
i walk forward my eyes open
in the dark
i don't know
I surrender
i feel like a bug in a jar
that never perishes
And I Surrender
my heart wails out to you

ray yorba

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The following comments are for "i don't know"
by mrray

Here's what I think .. I think if you can bother to capitalize GOD then you should take the same initiative with yourself .. as in ....

I instead of i

This i thing never impresses me .. I don't believe it sends the right message to a reader. Like .. here's me .. a reader .. looking at this and thinking .. jeez .. if the poet doesn't think enough of themselves .. then why should I?

You aren't the first I've raised this issue with so don't go feeling special.

( Posted by: Pen [Member] On: March 17, 2011 )

Web Speak is a no no!
Sorry Ray, but count me in with Pen on the i score!

Any high school freshmen knows (or should know)
that the small i when referring to yourself is a cardnal sin by itself. BUT coming from a poet who chooses to put his work out is a MORTAl sin! DO get points for capitalizing GOD!

In this era of texting, young peple are doing themselves a disservice by carrying over web speak into actual correspondence.

Try using that method on a college submission paper...good luck!

By the way...I enjoyed the essence of this poem...but it needs revision.


( Posted by: Beatrice Boyle [Member] On: March 17, 2011 )

Wonderful comments. Trust me, you are in good hands with these wonderful ladies.

( Posted by: Pablowilliams [Member] On: February 6, 2013 )

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