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Tell the truth and shame the devil,
give it to me straight; uncut and on the level.
Lies, deceit, and subterfuge,
spin an unyielding web for death's deluge.
The piper pipes his hallucinogenic tune.
Soulless shells of men, baying at the moon.
Stumbling to their destiny;
Dancing to their doom.
Too late to move the cliff,
or seal the great divide.
The chasm is too wide,
to reach the other side.


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The following comments are for "Hoodwink"
by MuddyBraun

awkward word
I was really enjoying reading this and then faltered at ...

maybe try lunatic instead which would match the moon and ramp up your rhyming factions too? Just a thought.

( Posted by: Pen [Member] On: February 18, 2011 )

Passing chance
It brings to my mind an opportunity that has come and gone, maybe to never return again. There are so many opportunities in "free" societies, and just as many "devils" who abuse them, distort them, and ply leverage to take opportunities away from others.

That's kind of what I get from this,

Nice job

( Posted by: BWOz [Member] On: February 19, 2011 )

Thank you
Thank you for reading my work and for taking the time to comment.
@Pen: I thought about using the word "hypnotic" also. but I chose "hallucinogenic" in an effort to imply some temporary distortion of reality, caused by a source outside our own mind, but not necessarily the type of insanity that is implied by "lunatic". Although I can see how "baying at the moon" would go with "lunatic". In order to fix the timbre problem, I put the emphasis on the second instead of the third syllable...

( Posted by: MuddyBraun [Member] On: March 8, 2011 )

I followed the comments to this piece. I too stumbled over hallucinogenic, but can see the reason for the word choice. Excellent piece, and I can admit to being a bit envious.

Looking forward to more.


( Posted by: Bartleby [Member] On: March 8, 2011 )

Aww shucks!
Thank you for your kind words Bartleby. I am flattered.

( Posted by: MuddyBraun [Member] On: March 22, 2011 )

The Chasm is too wide


( Posted by: ivordavies [Member] On: April 23, 2011 )

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