The following comments are for "Who's Her Daddy" by Pen
I read where you got the idea from...
And loved that you put your own take on it as well. Pen you are so inspiring with words. It amazes me how you can write about anything and make it look so easy. I can't even imagine all the creativity you carry around in that brain of yours. It is truly a blessing to be able to read you.
Posted by: nae411 [Member] On: February 11, 2011
Now I found this intriguing. Very clever use of language, word sounds, known themes and familiar folks. What I liked most is the switch up in last chorus - if I were to arrange this I think I would sandwich the last chorus 3-line with the normal refrain and take it out.
Posted by: jonpenny [Member] On: February 11, 2011
Nae & Ken
Many thanks for your comments. An interesting development has transpired. I received a peevish statement today about this poem.
Nae, I'm glad you saw the original post which I do have a copy of but won't post here because I believe it to be disrespectful. You see, there's been an opinion leveled by someone that they won't comment on this post because they don't know if I wrote it or if Judy did. How's that for irony? *chuckle*
Ken, I almost used the last line again and again instead of the three line refrain. I think that might have worked better. This was a hard write for me. Trying to get it lyrical while telling the story with clarity but not too much. There is a deliberate use of 'will' and 'sorry' in the refrain to reflect the story and how sorry Heath must be that he didn't keep his affairs in order. A reminder to all of us. Update your will when it's required.