THE MIDSUMMERS NIGHTMARE
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cast of characters: President AND Presidential Aide
Scene:Presidential Bedroom Time:near future, about sunrise.
Rise, dear sir, the hour is at hand.
Has time no mercy on my soul?
What manner of a joke's been layed on me?
No joke's been played this day, kind sir. To run, or not.
As many do indeed this very day. All Washington's aghast
with all the news.See! (flings open window curtains,sunlite
bursts into the room.)Does not the light make things to see?
Tis nobler then, to hide beneath my bed? Dirivitives!
Dirivitives! Would that I had never heard the name! What
manner of a beastly thing has brought us down?
I know naught of what you speak.
And better off you be than I. I speak of numbers in the
mist. I speak of piles of gold adrift in a sea of petroleum,
of diamonds and kings and the difference in a yen and my
mothers birthday multiplied by six! Surely a PhD could
explain it all so that we both might understand.Oh, God! Why
must I face this day?Where is my Secretary of the Treasurer?
I'll not go this path alone!
She has disposed of herself during the night,dear sir.
What? What's this you say?
Yes! Yes! She could not run. She could not either hide in a
world of her own device and making. She has fallen on her
sword, killed herself as surely as bears dook in the woods.
I always knew she was a twit!
By your very own appointment, I might remind you sir.
Yes, an evening of fun and wine will always bring you down.
And now it's time I pay. Call for the Vice President!
He is permanently indisposed, dear sir.
The coward! Would that I could tar and feather him first!
How dare he leave me to face the Dirivigate alone! Had he
no pride? Did I not bring him along for the ride, fully
knowing I'd have to explain my choice to the angry hords
of voters in the south? How did he go?
Painfully, I understand, dear sir. The measure of hemlock
was administered by a Republican physician, and not enough
for a hasty exit. He died in pain.
Ah, music to mine ears.
His entire familys wealth was wiped out, just like yours,
More! More! Give me more before I go to face the congress
and expose the situation of the mint.
Does this mean they lose their perks?
To the will of the dirivitives. Gone with the wind.
About that raise you promised me, sir....
Written some time ago during Bill Clinton's era
Fort Meade, MD
Fort Knox, KY