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Old man time lay in bed
His end close in sight
as he closed his eyes.
The hourglass of the year
draining the last sands to the bottom.
As the last grain hit the bottom,
A light encompasses the room.

Once the light subsided
The hourglass was filled
in the top once again.
A crying baby now
lay where the old man had been.
The cycle of the new year beginning
All over again.

------
if the pen is mighter then the sword then the word processer must be mighter then the missile


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Comments

The following comments are for "From Old Year to New year"
by johntellall

old man
I liked this 'cause it seems you had a clear idea of what you wanted to write before you sat down to write it. Here is some points to consider:
'The hourglass of the year'
maybe ' the years hourglass'
'draining the last sands to the bottom.'
maybe 'a year'sand draining'

take out 5th line 2nd stanza 'lay'

Just bsome thoughts - I think you should work this theme a bit more - a lot of material posible here.
thanks

( Posted by: jonpenny [Member] On: January 5, 2011 )

Old To New Year..
"The hourglass of the year" is like and kind to the Academy Award of the year...

Not Blindsided ...Truly great....and congratulations...on all the awards that you have received for your writings......

( Posted by: JetfireK [Member] On: January 7, 2011 )





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