Lit.Org - a community for readers and writers Advanced Search
 




Average Rating
0.00

(0 votes)

You must login to vote

Coyote-eyed,
It watches us.
It prowls ours shores and borders,
silent moments,
sleepless hours,
awkward corners.

My insufficiency.
My failure
to be the girl you still imagine.
Your complement,
The One
who’ll render you
the man you still believe you could be.

My self-sufficiency.
My introversion.
My failure
to make demands,
to be the girl
who couldn’t live without you.

And most obscene,
my normalcy.
My charmless bourgeois dullness.
The part of me too like yourself.
The weakness, also yours
and unaccepted.

It watches me:
I catch its glance,
unpitying,
observing every mis-step
as you absent yourself
into the restaurant’s champagne of frothy chatter.

Quite hopeless now
to offer more - more talk, more shallow brightness -
You’re somewhere else with your imagination.
You will not be back til morning.

Oh, there are moments,
making love,
when brittle angles soften,
when failure is moistened to forgiveness,
to collusion,
to occlusion.

Brought close enough
we seem complete.
Apart, illusion falters.

The lacunae in me
are also yours
and love,
ephemeral, unchecked
sifts swiftly through them.



Related Items

Comments

The following comments are for "Lacunae"
by MobiusSoul

The Way We Were
This poem brings to me the months before my break-up last December with a woman who is still in my thoughts daily; hourly. I would take the not-quite-perfection of our match back immediately, now, if she would allow it.

Very good to see you again, Caitlin.

( Posted by: Flonigus [Member] On: August 26, 2010 )

Empty Space between the words
Wow, I am reminded of Robert Plant's clasisic words, "Sometimes words have two meanings," of course from Stairway To Heaven. This is one of those rarest of songs that we heard constantly but never became sick of hearing, as opposed to songs like I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU, performed by Whitney Houston, that played so much that everyone hates it now.
Deciding whick meaning of Lacunae to apply to the totally professional words, I think, would be a personal matter, and this is what makes this poem so great. It is one of those rare poems that a poet writes, probalby unaware that they are writing not one poem, but two poems or maybe even three poems with the very same words. Fantastic, and if you intentionally tried to accomplish this, you would undoubtedly fail. This is indeed where the Muse takes total control. Write enough of this stuff and you will be

1. Wealthy.
2. Probably a poet laureate.
3. Widely published and recognized.
4. Toitally Insane.

( Posted by: veebdosa [Member] On: August 26, 2010 )

Gorgeous, Caitlin!
Caitlin...this is absolutely one of your best!

You just keep getting better and better. I'm going back to read it again and agin!

Bea

( Posted by: Beatrice Boyle [Member] On: August 26, 2010 )

Flonigus, Veebdosa, BB
Flonigus - I'm so sorry it didn't work out for you. Nobody warns us - certainly not our saccharin popular culture - of the forebearance, forgiveness and daily generosity of spirit required to keep a relationship viable. But thanks for the comment - it's nice to drop in here and find a familiar face/avatar. (And another one, Bea - thank you likewise!)

Veebdosa - I'm pleased that you found something universal here. I'll never be a laureate and I'm not sure that even they get rich off poetry! Still, I'd take #3... although not at the expense of #4. I value my sanity more than I value great art. That alone may disqualify me for genius...

Oh, and sorry about the bizarre great gaps in this poem: I'll fix the formatting shortly.

( Posted by: MobiusSoul [Member] On: August 27, 2010 )

Lovely turn of phrase
"when failure is moistened to forgiveness"

is delightful.

( Posted by: andyhavens [Member] On: September 11, 2010 )





Add Your Comment

You Must be a member to post comments and ratings. If you are NOT already a member, signup now it only takes a few seconds!

All Fields are required

Commenting Guidelines:
  • All comments must be about the writing. Non-related comments will be deleted.
  • Flaming, derogatory or messages attacking other members well be deleted.
  • Adult/Sexual comments or messages will be deleted.
  • All subjects MUST be PG. No cursing in subjects.
  • All comments must follow the sites posting guidelines.
The purpose of commenting on Lit.Org is to help writers improve their writing. Please post constructive feedback to help the author improve their work.


Username:
Password:
Subject:
Comment:





Login:
Password: