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Our dreams, like gutter rot,
feed the sticky crotch of human misery.
As flies regurgitate on hopes, that liquefy,
then siphon off the truth.
When death is all that's left
we toil in shallow graves and wait;
as maggots rend us back to dust
and so fulfill our fate.


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Comments

The following comments are for "Losers"
by JackGrady

he sticky crotch of human misery
Circular poem. I like that. The sticky crotch line is brilliant.

( Posted by: toscano [Member] On: August 8, 2010 )

As flies regurgitate on hopes, that liquefy,
I love this line. Great work Jack. I enjoyed the dark tones. Is there some format this is written in? Seems to really work in this piece. Keep writing,

Havoc

( Posted by: HavocTheDemon [Member] On: August 13, 2010 )

Losers
This is one of the finest poems I read this year.
Thanks for sharing it, Jack.
R K

( Posted by: R.K.Singh [Member] On: January 28, 2011 )

Raising the bar!
Thank you Jack, for remindng us of what the level of poetry here on Lit should be!

Bea

( Posted by: Beatrice Boyle [Member] On: January 28, 2011 )

Un-natural pause...
Ah-ha, shades of Edgar A. Poe, this is really on to something. My only concern is for the line stumbling because of the word "regurgitate".

I like it, but it seems to be a stumbling block for a couple of my friends who had trouble reading the line without stumbling. I thinkk that would be pretty common to most readers, but Poe would love it. So do I.

( Posted by: veebdosa [Member] On: January 28, 2011 )

Ghostwriters In the Sky LOL
I don't know, I just have some trouble saying in order to "study poetry seriously..." you have to study metaphore, imagry, connotation,rhythm, undercurrent needs tensioning (whatever the hell that means,) and all of the stuff that were required for poetry of the 19th century.

It is fine to teach, but if I, or anyone else, does not want to learn what you are teaching, then they probably want to do poetry their way, not your way.

Personally, I try to combine both ways into a finished poem, and am pretty good and successful at it.

But, I know a letter to my cousin when I read one, and yeh, I do indeed see lots of letters in poetry forems, some of them are even in LETTERS catagory/folders, because in real worlds, letters can be poetry.

Many politicians and entertainers actually pay talented writers real cash money to write letters for them, and also to write books and biographys for them.

You don't actually all of these goofy politicians actually write all of those books themselves, do you. Here is a FACT...

John F Kennedy did NOT write the book PROFILES OF COURAGE, but he was awarded the Pulitzer Prize for it. But it was actually written by Kennedy's speechwriter, Ted Sorenson. But Kennedy was given the credit for writing it and awarded the Pulitzer Prize. But Sorenson wrote it.

Ghostwriters make tons and tons of money, just check it out and then go to Washington DC and make a ton of money, too. It happens every single day.

( Posted by: veebdosa [Member] On: January 28, 2011 )





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