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Tomorrowland hits yesterdayville forever, after
 
the sun has peaked its zenith - Yelling
 
once loudly, in color - dissolves
 
into fizzly blowing fresh wind of night, as
 
a little curious girl points at a blinked star,
 
the same sparkling star she'll one day point to her own future child - now
 
nothing more than her toy-doll fancy,
 
a toy doll stuck overnight in a toy stroller,
 
waiting - of course - for tomrrowland to pass yesterdayville, once-again-upon the waning of the last-day's brilliant sun.

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-=[ Blank this intentional space! ]=-


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Comments

The following comments are for "Tomorrowland"
by ak7raplt

not sure what to make of...
I am not sure what to make of this one. I would like to say I enjoyed it, but this was the first poem I haven't enjoyed quite the same way. There is something both hopeful and sad in it though.......
ka

( Posted by: DarkMagic [Member] On: May 22, 2003 )

liked it...
I think you painted this picture very well. It evokes great emotion; simplistically so. I can nearly touch the little girl. Beautiful.
Cat.

( Posted by: c.lynagh [Member] On: May 23, 2003 )

Only one point..
Forgot to mention this, I found the way you set it out kind of miss jointed. Perhaps solid paragraphs or better sentences might make it easier to get the full flow.
C

( Posted by: c.lynagh [Member] On: May 23, 2003 )





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