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1angelatini
5pablowilliams

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My heart is not a toy, fate!
Your calloused games towards men,
I do not enjoy.
From tears sprang joy,
and from joy pours tears of loss.
These silly games,
my heart cannot admire.

Fate, how you've mocked me,
destiny how you weave such folly.
I walk with a high head,
shoulders apart, standing tall,
and yet you play with me,
as though my strength weren't here at all.

My kitten heart, a mouse in your maze,
my claws are forming,
though desperate acts, in pain.
May I never scratch in vain.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ok, now I gotta say, I have no right to even contemplate these turbulant emotional waters I swim through right now, considering the stresses of those I love, and those I care for all around me. Still, I felt it nessecary to write this today. My goodest girlie friend (with y chromasones), angelra, with her feminine logic, (omg thats gonna come out wrong), just joined up here to comment on this.... She is a gooder writers than i's am, so I's just happyness she be here. Kthxbai. Cookies for everyone forever!
Much Love

------
"If the America people ever allow private banks to control the issuance of their currencies, first by inflation and then by deflation, the banks and corporations that will grow up around them will deprive the people of all their prosperity until their children will wake up homeless on the continent their fathers conquered." ~Thomas Jefforson


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Comments

The following comments are for "Heart Fate"
by roach

Your poor 'kitten heart'
Ok. You knew I was going to write this so...
Here I go.

As I am reading this poem, I'm feeling it right up to the part about a 'kitten heart'.
I mean, really?!
So you are a mouse, with a kitten heart and claws?
It makes absolutely no sense and I know you can do better than that.
So go fix it, Mr. Meow-meow.

( Posted by: angelatini [Member] On: October 20, 2009 )

Just a suggestion:
Ouch!
your heart has suffered much, that I can glean from this. The part I had trouble with was the lack of accountability, seemed pathetic. But, there is much to work with here. Perhaps, less words would be needed. Even a sigh, would do it.

Thanks for sharing.

For your friend-

This would work,Perhaps:

My kitten heart-
claws forming-
in desperate acts,
May I never scratch in vain.

( Posted by: pablowilliams [Member] On: October 21, 2009 )

thanks yall
hey, in my own defense, this was purely for myself. i wanted to be indulgent in this, and the line that causes so much confusion, was personal and totally for meee!

also, i used fewer words than I wanted to, just to keep it in good form.

mm'kiddles? kthxbai.

( Posted by: roach [Member] On: October 22, 2009 )

2 roach
Sometimes being self in dulgent can get you in trouble. I don't know what I can say - you poor guy!;)

( Posted by: jonpenny [Member] On: October 23, 2009 )

awww
Ok now its official, nobody likes my kitten heart :( :) :X

( Posted by: roach [Member] On: October 23, 2009 )





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