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Oh, hi  
A? Is that you?  
Aha, itís me  
Whatís with the tone? You donít seem to be the guy I know  
No, I am fine. I just.. just..  
Just what? Anything wrong?  
Nothing is wrong. I just felt like calling you and did  
Listen, I know you  
Sure you do. Thatís why I..  
I am not ok. I feel sad. I canít take it anymore  
A? What happened?  
This burden, this major.. The way I will be  
Your studies?  
Yes. I canít, I canít take it anymore  
Heey, nothing is easy  
I know. But this is so hard for me. I canít continue. I feel so down  
Come on A, its life. The path you are in need some hard work  
Yes, yes.. I know. Hard work. I am sick of it. Everyday you wake up, and you are obsessed by it. You donít feel free. Caged. Thatís the right term to say. Even on Sunday's night; people go out for fun, refreshing themselves and I..  
You do go out on Sunday. You do have fun. Donít we always get together on Sundays?  
Yes, thatís right. When I go out, I say to the hell with it, its my fun time. When I am back, I keep thinking of the minutes wasted on nothing, but the joy of my own. I really do. And as a way to help myself through, I say to it, next week I will not go out. I will sit at home  
But you donít  
Yes. I donít. I can't. I really need to go out. To change  
So change whatís wrong with that?  
A? Thatís called organisation  
I do organise myself I really do, but..  
But what? How come someone who organise himself fall at the end? Thatís unreal.  
I donít know ok? But I fall, fall hard  
How to the others cope with such thing while you can't?  
They are nerds. They canít help leaving the book. They are ..  
Be a nerd then, just like them  
I can't. I am not that sort of person. I need fun, I need joy  
Then leave. Change the major.  
No, I canít, I love it. I want to be it  
How can you love who you canít get? If you love someone, you will do the impossible to keep that love. You scarify your joys for them. Make them smile, while you know that you have the urge to cry. You love it, him, her, anything. You just said it you want it. No, you did not, you said you want to be it. Love is not easy. People cry, some die because they love someone. They..  
Someone? I love my major that is all  
Then? Why do you want to switch majors? Arenít you sick of it? Donít it make your life miserable? You said it, answer me  
Listen, it's true .. The major you are in is hard. Not hard. Deadly hard. Thatís why you are unique, and you know it. Not everyone got to be the one the future holds for you to be  
I know, I just canít help it anymore. I always try to arrange myself. Schedule this, do that. Restrain myself, but I can't. Itís overwhelming me. I feel so sad about myself. Sometimes I envy the others, those with different majors. The ones who come and say "This is so hard", and I know it is not.  
For you its not, but for them it is. Listen A, when you had chosen the major, you had been told that it's tough. Some even tried to convince you not to, but you said it loud, "if it is easy for them, it is easy for me". And now it's not the A, I know.  
No, itís just that I can't be it any longer. I overestimated myself, but now I know I can't  
What about the others? How did they survive?  
They love to be that way.  
Love? Donít they love? Love it? Just like you? A?  
They do  
A, listen, even if you fall, that does not mean you can not get it. You will. I am sure. Just relax, and whatever stress is in the vicinity will so go, and I am sure you will be back. Just keep in mind that you love it, love it strongly.  
Thanks J,  
Donít. Hope that you will remember me when you are whatever your love takes you with  
I will J, I will never forget this. You are my friend, and a "love"  
Take care A, and a happy love day

© Copyright by Virus

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