Lit.Org - a community for readers and writers Advanced Search

Average Rating

(2 votes)

RatingRated by

You must login to vote

You’re car is gone


He went away


He may not be the one for me


But I worry that he is

And he is gone


An invisible arrow strikes my chest

He is no where to be seen

I begin to panic

I look desperately for him

And another arrow strikes my heart

From my own bow and hand


I must let go


Let go and


Just keep breathing

In and out

A big deep breath in

Slower exhale out

Inhale for six

Exhale for eight

Eight and


Ten and


Keep on counting

And forget

Related Items


The following comments are for "Help me to Breathe"
by Padme

inhale - exhale - breathe...
Looks, like you got it all fixed, the breath vs breathe, great;-)

Breath, awareness of breath by the meditator, is one of the most primary basics of beginning meditation and meditators. Of course, psychologists and other health professionals also suggest various exercises regarding this same concept in order to relieve stress.

I also see this, from my perspective as a Tibetan Buddhist about "letting go", attachments are a source of suffering and stress, and throughout my life I have had to let go of many material things, once I did, I found that they were just things, things can be replaces, and they always were, I have been lucky in that department. Now when it comes to people, you cannot replace people, relationships, but at some point you must "let go", that allows the karma or right person (if one is meant to be) to come to you or you to them, clinging to what is not meant to be, what is not right, what is causing you suffering only leads to more of same, but I am sure you are quite aware of that due to the nature of this most thought filled post.

Good piece of work here...I enjoyed this one very much, right up my alley, particularly these days;-)

( Posted by: TheRealKarmaTseringLhamo [Member] On: February 18, 2009 )

I loved this. I read it several times and took the word 'breath' as a command and loved the cadence. One question:Did you mean for the word to be 'breath' or 'breathe'. I kinda like the verb better than the noun - but either way - good job. ;)

( Posted by: jonpenny [Member] On: February 18, 2009 )

The hardest times to practice (mindfulness of our breath) are when we need it the most. Sometimes when things are really, really tough all one can do is keep breathing.

Your poem conveys all of this quite beautifully, as well as the sense of tension, the powerful emotion and the flurry of thoughts that call for the breath in the first place.

My read on it, anyway...

Most enjoyable! Thank you!

( Posted by: Eldros [Member] On: February 25, 2009 )

Add Your Comment

You Must be a member to post comments and ratings. If you are NOT already a member, signup now it only takes a few seconds!

All Fields are required

Commenting Guidelines:
  • All comments must be about the writing. Non-related comments will be deleted.
  • Flaming, derogatory or messages attacking other members well be deleted.
  • Adult/Sexual comments or messages will be deleted.
  • All subjects MUST be PG. No cursing in subjects.
  • All comments must follow the sites posting guidelines.
The purpose of commenting on Lit.Org is to help writers improve their writing. Please post constructive feedback to help the author improve their work.