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JOIN YOUR HEARTS
WITH THREADS OF LOVE.
SEW YOUR DREAMS & HOPES
WITH POCKETS OF CARE.
STITCH YOUR NEEDS & DESIRES
WITHOUT ANY BIAS.
TAKE THE SEAMS OF YOUR LIFE
AND DESIGN THE CLOTH.
TAKE CARE THE NEEDLE
PULL OUT ANY PINS.
AND THE WOVEN FABRIC
OF YOUR HEARTS
YOU'LL WEAR COMFORTABLY
THROUGHOUT THE YEARS.
By Gale.

------
Jayne Gale


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Comments

The following comments are for "DESIGN OF LOVE"
by Gale

a stitch in time
Definitely a stitch in time for Valentine's Day!

Clever, beautiful and meaningful.

Sandra

( Posted by: sandra [Member] On: February 10, 2009 )

Design
Nice poem. I loved it - very clever.

Bright colors cover where I am torn
Cleverly woven and easily worn.
For every gift of friendship born
What better garb that for love adorn


Thanks

( Posted by: jonpenny [Member] On: February 13, 2009 )

@jonpenny
Thank you for your comment. I too loved your lines in response, although I struggled a bit with the last line and hope you will work on it as you have the makings of something fabulous! The first two lines not only have a great beat but tell a story so cleverly, oh my! I feel this could be a bigger piece and maybe it is, and so good! Keep going you are good! Thx again, Gale.

( Posted by: Gale [Member] On: February 13, 2009 )

Design of love
'Bright colors cover where I am torn
Cleverly woven and easily worn.
For every gift of friendship born
Granted by a kinder heart'

Thanks -But you were and are the muse.

I have an idea and a challange to you and all. Let's write this Valentine's Day Poem together.
Gale,why don't you write the next stanza. LIne 1-2-3 any rhyme. 4th line rhymes with all the other 4th lines in all stanzas. Love is worth it!

Thanks

( Posted by: jonpenny [Member] On: February 14, 2009 )

@jonpenny
Thankyou jonpenny. I see you've made a change in the last line. However I feel that your previous last line was actually very good it just needed an adjustment as the word 'that' was really what didn't make it work when I thought it over. I felt if you added 'to' like this, 'What better garb for love to adorn.' it would not only make it more concise but it would flow with the previous lines well and keep to your original thought pattern. What do you think of this idea? As for the Valentine's poem I am flattered thank you, but I am working to a deadline for a Bulletin this week, however others may be interested, it is a good idea, best wishes, Gale.

( Posted by: Gale [Member] On: February 14, 2009 )





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