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My eyes met a screen
"the Color Purple"
fields of lavender flowers, a woman in a red dress.
My mouth may have watered.
My insides may have ached.

Things you want your whole life
knowing this is what you long for, but
not how to get it.

Scenes of women kissing women
fetishes of lesbian erotica
high school parties
the way it becomes mainstream, the way it
becomes acceptable, but
not the same.
Not truly capturing, not getting, not true...

Until I sit in front of a mirror
and think to kiss it.
A reflection of myself, something simple
not erotic or flashy. Not what it was.

Just a deep longing never fully realized.
Always waiting, always feeling the mold
not right.

They don't show you what it is,
they show you something you can't live up to.

And you you never make a move,
you're still, motionless. In wonder
of what exactly to do.

In front of a mirror,
I just want to touch a reflection of myself.

------
someday could be today...





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Comments

The following comments are for "kissing a mirror"
by ruina

they is
desvelado-
I think "they" is more of an idea than a group of people. 'they" can be the media, society at large, a metaphore for yourself/concetpts/instituions/blahblahblah. I like using "they" in poetry because it could be so many things and adds a little mystery.
"They" is whoever you want.

thanks for commenting!! It's really helpful to hear what other cats think.
-arwyn

ps. in situations where "they" means society, it's safe to assume that the writer is including him/herself, whether or not she means to. ;)

( Posted by: ruina [Member] On: July 29, 2008 )

flim flam
It reminds me of what public entertainment has become. Even product ads focus on entertaining us first, never mind trying to sell us the product. I especially like the lines
"They don't show you what it is,
they show you something you can't live up to."

that is so true, what used to be called flim-flam in the past. Like the hidden shell trick -- fun to watch as long as someone else is getting shafted.

good thoughts.

BW

( Posted by: BWOz [Member] On: July 30, 2008 )

soul sucking simulacrums
'cause I'm feeling alliterate today...

so true, this. every time the media recycles reality it removes itself further from the truth, all you get is a glossier version of the same, seamless and false with the heart ripped out... to the naked eye you might be looking at the same thing, but you're not...

naked self in mirror is both most and least honest. most honest because you cannot really hide from yourself, false because you are so accustomed to self you miss chunks by default...

resonant with frustration and longing. a real pleasure to read you again.

( Posted by: AuldMiseryGuts [Member] On: July 31, 2008 )

glad you liked
i'm glad to back, i missed reading you, as well.

( Posted by: ruina [Member] On: August 1, 2008 )

also
to continue the media discussion in relation to this poem: I think it's super fucked up the way lesbianism has been fetishized to the point of pure objectification. I have friends who are afraid to touch each other in public, someone once got out of a car and punched a girl i knew in the face when he saw her kiss her girlfriend. But when it's on TV or in porno suddenly everyman loves it.
talk about the distortion of reality. when it's entertainment it's fine, but your emotions are unnatural...

( Posted by: ruina [Member] On: August 1, 2008 )





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