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The pain that floods my soul…

The pain that floods my soul
Burns and hurts spins me into an evolution
No where listed in the constitution
Under life and the pursuit of happiness
Was a stylistic portrait of me

Yeah I’m stressed
Mind bent
I confess that this here game called life hurts
Burns and leaves me yearning for yet
Another turn
Another chance
…To try

I’ve given up on asking the reasons why… to a point
Until I come up with a new joint
Now I just wonder when
When… will… I… be… free?
How do I escape to just be me?

Quick clichés of seemingly smarter then me folk
Have ran their course,
All over my head and still I
Am left with these burns,
These hurts and pains
I say evolution cause I know this has got evolve into
Something!

When it’s quiet it’s loud and when it’s loud I ache and ache
Cause I just aint where I want to be but I heard somewhere that I’m right where I’m suppose to be...

This is what I feel
So don’t you go telling me I can’t have feelings
Cause it’s too late

Say a prayer? um...
My knees are black and my tears have fallen, my
Hands have been folded and my arms have been out stretched,
My face has been in the floor and my head held down,
My mouth has been dry...dry to the point of sleep
My tears have turned into whimpers
For there is nothing left
I… am… spent

Oh, the pain that floods my soul!
It’s a wonder my blood hasn’t begun to boil
My heart hasn’t busted
From these pains of being
Discussed with this game called life

Constitute this… Construct that… Create this

...I confirm this bliss- less- ness...and
that a change is going to come? What? NO
Has to come!

Change?
…I have
…I will
…I can
…I am…
I am…
Evolving from
This pain
This hurt that
Encourages me… to live
My soul just won’t let it be

This still doesn’t stop the feeling
Cause I’m still alive
I won’t feel anything when I die…
and it won’t matter then.

LMJ


------
LMJ


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Comments

The following comments are for "The pain that floods my soul..."
by LMJ

"this bliss- less- ness"
gut-punch powerful performance piece, this, and a really intense process poem, as if the soul were a rock in a tumbler, being gradually polished by all of life’s hardships, to emerge… brighter. love that idea, that through suffering we “evolve”, certainly, those people who have never known pain aren’t very interesting, self-aware or spiritually astute. pain is part of the picture, let’s us know we’ve lived…

think the most winning thing about this, for me, is the determination to do better, be better, be SOMEthing… reminds me that we’re not defined by the shit that happens to us, only by how we choose to deal with it… you said a mouthful. great stuff.

( Posted by: AuldMiseryGuts [Member] On: June 6, 2008 )

Shannon Girl!...
I was really t-ed off when I wrote this piece and after I wrote it and read it I was not only uplifted but I felt a sense of validation in all that I'd felt to have flowing on paper so neatly when in fact nothing has been tidy. It has all been in fact a very messy clean up ( the wreckage of ones past) which can be in turn upsetting.

thank you for the comment!

( Posted by: LMJ [Member] On: June 6, 2008 )

HEY LMJ.....
...I'm going to teach you the same lesson I learned and I learned it in the same HARD WAY...

SHANNON.....is a man!

I think it's an Irish thing

( Posted by: TAMMYHENDRIX [Member] On: June 6, 2008 )

OPPS!...Shannon&Tammy...
Tammy thank you!

Shannon: Sorry :-(

Please forgive give me.

( Posted by: LMJ [Member] On: June 8, 2008 )

LMJ
no bother, seriously, it happens all the time. it happens in real life too [such a pretty-boy, I am] ;)...

( Posted by: AuldMiseryGuts [Member] On: June 8, 2008 )

To meet Shannon...
I believe it too! I wish I could meet you you are such an interesting person, you and Des...Tammy and Lucie too. I really like you all.

Well at least now I know!

( Posted by: LMJ [Member] On: June 8, 2008 )

back at ye
although those who have met me will attest to the fact that the novelty soon wears off ;) ...

I did have a MySpace account for a while, full of my nonsensical ravings and embarrassing pictures, but that was a bit of a non-starter... on Live Journal now, which I like a bit better, but use mostly for keeping in touch with a few folks, and previewing the poetry and prose I’m not so sure about… there’s a lot of that…

Des reckons we’re destined to meet. he’s promised to take me to Disney Land ;) … hey, I’m sure there’s room for one more.

( Posted by: AuldMiseryGuts [Member] On: June 8, 2008 )

you: Shannon...Boom!
you are sweet & kind, thank you.

( Posted by: LMJ [Member] On: June 8, 2008 )





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