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Crushed between the heart and head
I fail to get along with
my own creation

sinister and righteous
that challenges my being
for not meeting her hopes

I did what I could
but how to produce a mate
for her peace and bliss

she raises her eyebrows
and isolates herself as if
I authored all her griefs

now stripped and alone
with hands over my chest
I stand in the street

await the coffin
to reconcile the truths
I could not conceive


--R.K.SINGH

------
R K Singh


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The following comments are for "SELF-DEFEAT"
by R.K.Singh

those last three lines
"await the coffin
to reconcile the truths
I could not conceive"

they are breath-taking, R.K… a highly complex piece, this, with many possibilities. one of which being- to mind anyway- a corpse [literal or figurative] narrating about the significant other he left behind… there is certainly grief here, but the greater part of that grief seems to be disillusionment…

I think those last three lines too hint at an ultimate dawning of realisation, a sense of perspective or of completion that could be arrived at through “death”… I will keep on returning to this until I have absorbed all it has to offer… which is a great deal. thank you for sharing this. best to you.

( Posted by: AuldMiseryGuts [Member] On: April 10, 2008 )

reconciling truths
I read a father's impotence in this. Seems all fathers only want happiness for their children but daughters are a whole different matter. They're harder to let go.

Wonderful as always.

( Posted by: desvelado [Member] On: April 11, 2008 )

father
Yes, desvelado, you are perfectly right. My daughter has become a challenge to me. She has stopped communicating as I could not communicate to her what she wanted. My impotence as father, indeed. No idea how to come out of it?
I also share with Shannon what he hints quoting the last three lines. The poem is very complex, like the complexity of the mind of its creator!
R K

( Posted by: R.K.Singh [Member] On: April 11, 2008 )

Time to let Go
Hi RK

I am sure most parents get to this stage.... Just when is the time to let go ????

My kids are far smarter than me... way too smart perhaps to enjoy the good life that I have had...
and of course ... still having...

On the other hand.. he who pays the piper.... can cut off their... allowances.

Eric

( Posted by: Fairplay [Member] On: April 11, 2008 )

R.KIt's in the contract.
R.K.Singh,

I know you don't know me and you may think me arrogant to try and give advice on a father/daughter relationship that I know nothing about but that is by no means my intentions here. I am just trying to reach out and offer some sort of support and comfort to a fellow parent who is obviously at a loss and in pain. As the mother of a 16 year old, "I'm a woman now I can make my own decisions" daughter, believe me we have been through our share of mother/daughter problems. We still are. I just thought it might help you to know that someone does understand. This is actually a piece I just wrote. I was going to post it tonight but after reading your writing so full of suffering I thought I might replace the mother character with a father and send it to you. I hope it helps.

IT'S IN THE CONTRACT

A daughters naive awareness of unrealistic expectations-it's in the contract.

A fathers honorable attempts to stand true on a pedestal of gods-it's in the contract.

A mutual loss in comprehension of the falling of the gods-it's in the contract.

A daughters rebellion against any and all-it's in the contract.

A fathers loss of words that leads to resistance in understanding-it's in the contract.

A daughter's struggle between the need for independence and the uncertainty of pulling away from the ties that bind-it's in the contract.

A fathers desperate attempts to keep secure the youth of unconditional love-it's in the contract.

A painful pulling while she's pushing and pushing while she's pulling-it's in the contract.

A daughters uncertainties in her abilities to live the lessons taught-it's in the contract.

A father's doubt in teachings that will now be carried on-it's in the contract.

A daughters panic of growing towards an unknown territory of the needs of a woman-it's in the contract.

A fathers projecting fear of another's rank and intentions with the one of whom he invested his all-it's in the contract.

A daughters revelations of the source by whom all others are measured-it's in the contract.

A resilient effort in the name of love for one another-it's in the contract.

A remarkable evolution of an enduring love earned through years of exhausting lessons in life=it's in the contract.

The unbreakable bond of a father and daughter-yea thats in the contract too.

From the moment of birth a love for the life we've created can only be described as consuming.
Our creations bring along with them a lifetime of enlightenment. Including the enlightenment of imperfection which in turn defines what was actually perfect after all. An unparalleled love and lifetime full of what seems to be endless conflict between a parent and child. It's all in the contract of love.

From one struggling parent to another. She's reached a point in her life when SHE probably doesn't even understand her own behavior. Now more than ever she needs patience and understanding from the one man she knows she can trust. But when it's time for her to be alone with her thoughts, give her that time. And when she's ready to talk don't listen to her-HEAR her. Simply sit and listen. Maybe it's time to relinquish a little control.

P.S. Did I say that I thought your piece is beautifully heartbreaking. I loved it.
Tammy






.

( Posted by: TAMMYHENDRIX [Member] On: April 11, 2008 )

SELF-DEFEAT
Dear Shannon, your comments have always enlightened me. I am happy you could sense the complexity of the poet's situation as a parent and think about an issue we often feel helpless about.
desvelado has been nearer my situation and I am obliged to him for his very empathetic response.
Eric is right in sharing the common experience we all seem to have faced (or may be facing) as a father or mother. Because we love our children we are naturally worried about them just as we would like them to have all freedom they seek. But when they create a crisis we are often challenged too.
And, believe me Tammy, I honor the contract. What you say is absolutely correct and I have no reason to contradict you. Your words give me strength!
R K

( Posted by: R.K.Singh [Member] On: April 23, 2008 )





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