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By
Fritzwilliam
--Why settle for slow when fast is so much better?
I dunno. Ask the hare.
--Why just hang around when getting there is so much nicer?
I dunno. Depends on where you're going.
--Why tell the truth when lies are so much funner?
I dunno. Ask Bill Clinton.
--Why be satisfied proving one imbicile right when taking on a whole bunch makes you seem so much smarter?
I dunno. Ask Rush Limbaugh and Glenn Beck.
--Why down a six-pack when a twelve will make you look so much cooler?
I dunno. Ask Dave Hasselhoff.
--Why stick with influence peddling when outright fraud can make you so much richer?
I dunno. Ask Jack Abramoff (1).
--Why be a lowly hypocrite when all-out bigotry can make you so much more the charmer?
I dunno. Ask Randy (Duke) Cunningham (2), (3).
--Why engage in "good ol' boy" politics when being a complete suck-up gets it done so much quicker?
I dunno. Ask "Scooter" Libby
--Why be just a "salute-and-take-the-hill" soldier when aligning yourself with whacked-out neoconservative causes under a "Teflon" president can make you look so much hipper?
I dunno. Ask Oliver North.
--Why be just an ordinary "family values" type of guy when you could take on the much more challenging game of "who knew?". . .and so much sooner?
I dunno. Ask Senator Larry Craig.
--Why would a self-described "foot soldier" in the Reagan Revolution and a member of the infamous "Keating Five" from that era get fired up over campaign finance reform when if he'd just used the money "when the gettin' was good" to replace those skinny 80's neckties he's still wearing, he'd now look so much snappier?
I dunno. Ask Senator John McCain (4).
And finally,
--Why would anyone keep their nose to the grindstone and work their fingers to the bone in order to reach the top when they can cheat, cut every corner in the book, and still get ahead so much faster?
I dunno. You'll just have to ask George W. Bush for yourself.
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(1) "It is not our job to seek peaceful coexistence with the Left. Our job is to remove them from power permanently." [Jack Abramoff, ]
(2) In September 1996 Cunningham attacked President Clinton for appointing judges who were "soft on crime". "We must get tough on drug dealers," he said, adding that "those who peddle destruction on our children must pay dearly." He favored stiff drug penalties and voted for the death penalty for major drug dealers [from Wikipedia].
(3) Four months later, his son Todd was arrested for helping to transport 400 pounds (181 kg) of marijuana from Massachusetts to California. Todd Cunningham pleaded guilty to possession and conspiracy to sell marijuana. At his son's sentencing hearing, Cunningham fought back tears as he begged the judge for leniency.
(4) The Keating Five were five United States Senators who were accused of corruption in 1989, igniting a major political scandal as part of the larger Savings and Loan crisis of the late 1980s and early 1990s. The five senators (Cranston, DeConcini, Riegle, Glenn, and McCain) were accused of improperly aiding Charles H. Keating, Jr., chairman of the failed Lincoln Savings and Loan Association, which was the target of an investigation by the Federal Home Loan Bank Board.
After a lengthy investigation, the Senate Ethics Committee determined in 1991 that Alan Cranston, Dennis DeConcini, and Donald Riegle had substantially and improperly interfered with the FHLBB in its investigation of Lincoln Savings, while John Glenn and John McCain had been only minimally involved. The Committee recommended censure for Cranston and criticized the other four for "questionable conduct." [from Wikipedia]
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Copyright (c) 2008 F. William Bracy
All rights reserved.
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Fritzwilliam
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Issue Two--Skidding on Oil
