Beware of Lurking Quirks
by Penelope (Member) - published: September 18, 2007
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Ever been hogtied by an expression that makes no sense but you can’t shake? Maybe something your friends or relations said on a regular basis which persisted in puzzling you? Or perhaps you’ve read a phrase (or word) somewhere which seemed so totally illogical that it drove you to distracted? It might have even been something you heard somewhere (anywhere) which stole you away from the intent of the conversation into the realms of the implausible. Often commercials in their frenzy to sell a product create a catch phrase that scrapes the bottom of the nonsense barrel and leave you grasping for common sense.

Here’s your opportunity to share them and expand your convoluted compulsive repertoire disorder as well. You could even string a raft of them together into a poem if you are so inclined ... hah! I double dare you!

To get the ball rolling, my all time favourite:
To be told when asking for directions - You can’t get there from here.

or how about?
Shit eating grin.

------
"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent" - Eleanor Roosevelt

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Comments

The following comments are for "Beware of Lurking Quirks"
by Penelope

Oh, isn't this just great, Pen?
Oh, great so you go and start a thread the same time as me, now I'll never get anyone to do my thread, since it turns out that yours is way more fun and cooler than mine. ;-)

So, about these lurking quirks, can be street slang terms I know, have heard? Or only mainstream slang quirks?

For starters, my all time favorite that I find funny is: WTF? (No elaboration needed)

A clean one that confused me as a kid was:

"Come hell or highwater"

( Posted by: TheRealKarmaTseringLhamo [Member] On: September 18, 2007 )

"Nuf said"...Pen
"Nuf said" was a source of confusion to my youngest daughter, when she was a child of 11, one day she asked me who is "Nuf"? Confused I asked her what she was talking about? "What Nuf"? I said. She said, "You know NUF, that person always saying things that people copy"....Nuf said this, Nuf said that! you know, NUF!"

( Posted by: TheRealKarmaTseringLhamo [Member] On: September 19, 2007 )

Quirks #1
" If you have to ask" my step father used to say, "then I'm not going to tell you." What?! That one used to infuriate me. I'm sure there's more...

( Posted by: AuldMiseryGuts [Member] On: September 19, 2007 )

Quirk
If you ask you dont get
If you dont ask you dont need

It was just a long winded way of sayin NO

Eric

( Posted by: Fairplay [Member] On: September 19, 2007 )

quirk
"it is what it is" sometihng about this just throws me over the edge.. what does this mean? you have no opinion or no sense of education and that this is the easy way out explaining a long truth of what is real....just bothers me. christopher

( Posted by: NucleusFire [Member] On: September 19, 2007 )

Pen's thread
As a child , mother used to comb my hair to get the "rats" out...also a hand full of hair with them...the tears would be rolling down my cheeks and mother would say, "You have to suffer to be beautiful."

Many years later, being married and getting angry at times...my exs favorite saying to me was ,"It's better to be pissed off than pissed on..."

Here are two words that my old school friend used that always drove me to distraction..".I have a good IDEAL." (Idea)
and the ever popular..."I have to go to the TORLET." (toilet)
I know her mother came from Kentucky but don't really know if all Kentuckians speak that way... anyway I wanted to pull my hair out....

I'll have to pay more attention to commercials and get back to you on a catch phrase or two...Kacee

( Posted by: nitz kitty [Member] On: September 19, 2007 )

Pen's thread
The only commercial that drives me up a wall is "Head On" ..."Apply directly to the forehead." 75 times...

( Posted by: nitz kitty [Member] On: September 19, 2007 )

quirk alert
my bad .... argghhhh!!

Kacee - one commercial which was totally confusing to me as a child ...

I'd walk a mile for a camel. ?????

( Posted by: Penelope [Member] On: September 19, 2007 )

quirky mom
I'd say ... 'Do you know what?'

Mom would say ... ' A little child is called a tot.'

This is probably why I never wrote poetry until I was thoroughly over this parental irritant.

( Posted by: Penelope [Member] On: September 19, 2007 )

quirks
People not using the accurate words when they speak, and the best example of this is when somebody comes at me with "That's interesting".

Interesting?

INTERESTING???

It's f*****g INFURIATING is what it is!!!

So say it!

Say "infuriating".

Go ahead.

Try saying it.

Now try saying it again.

And do not give me that passive-aggressive "interesting" crap!!!

Ever again!!!

Whew...

( Posted by: windchime [Member] On: September 19, 2007 )

ha ha ha!!
Lucie! Me too!! Also ... When people say ... 'I'm confused' when they should be saying ... 'I'm a F#$%%%G idiot!!' My brother said this to me when I proved to him that our elder brother had been lying to him on a regular basis to ensure his theft of our parent's money wasn't discovered.

( Posted by: Penelope [Member] On: September 19, 2007 )

quirks
I notice people here remembering childhood occurences. Here's mine: when my brother and I would ask my mother what was for supper, she'd tell us that if we had to ask, we weren't hungry. Of course, that wasn't long enough, yet, after her time in a Siberian labour camp, so it's understandable, in retrospect, but to a little kid, it's puzzling.

( Posted by: windchime [Member] On: September 19, 2007 )

which brings me to this
"May you live in interesting times"

is, I'm told, an ancient Chinese curse. Well, this one convinces me that we have inherited more than ancient Chinese wisdom. We have inherited ancient Chinese stupidity.

Every era is interesting in its own way and for its own reasons. Interesting is the quality of something that has interest.

Could it be that "may you live in boring times" would be a, what, a blessing?

Or is it that the Chinese, also, are passive aggressive, and their "interesting" also means "infuriating"???

Then again, we are living in interesting times. We do pay interest, after all...Would the curse have originated at a time when loans were zero percent?

I guess I'm a confused idiot.

Duh.

( Posted by: windchime [Member] On: September 19, 2007 )

The Riot Act
Theres starving children in Toronto..for Godsakes people lets get a grip before I "Read You The Riot Act" what the holy hell is The Riot Act??? and when was this particular piece of legislation passed...was there a referendum???? or did congress just sneak this one through in the middle of the night????

( Posted by: kilgoretrout [Member] On: September 19, 2007 )

Penelope's quirks
"putting my foot down with a firm hand"

Que? I like this quote but what in God's green Earth...? Reminds me of something my mom said to my sister 'bout 30 years ago:
"Turn off the shoe or I'm throwing the light at you!"

She actually said it in spanish which was funnier. I know my mom's quote might not qualify but ya had to be there...

( Posted by: desvelado [Member] On: September 19, 2007 )

more quirk
This is a daily occurence for me, but not with TV commenrcials, more with TV news.

In Canada, we have two official languages. In English, we say "make" a decision. In French, it's "prendre une decision" and so, Quebecers whose first language is French will almost always say "take a decision". I have had it to the eyeballs with that!!! Politicians ought to be able to speak both languages correctly.

At my workplace, we have rounds every day. One of our (francophone) physicians is in the habit of saying "ceci etant dit" which, in English, translates into "having said that", yet she persists, when speaking English, with "that being said", a literal, and obviously inadequate translation.

It's all the time, this. All the effing time, already!!!

Omigod!
Omigod!

THAT'S why the ROC (rest of Canada) calls Quebecers "Frenchies". Now I get it! It's because of this collective inability/unwillingness to learn the proper translation, and because of this collective "security blanket" of "French-isms".

I groan at "isms" too, but you know that already...

( Posted by: windchime [Member] On: September 19, 2007 )

Riot Act
I can help out on the riot act…..

Blame the British for that one… we had to find a way of stopping people from gathering in groups and getting up to mischief…. In theory you could tell them it was an unlawfull group in specific words and if they didn’t disperse kill them.

We tried to use it in NI in the late sixties (It never worked, we were reluctant to kill randomly and no-one ever dispesed anyway) we would fly over in our little helicopters playing a pre recorded message over a loudspeaker….I think the wording had to be exact or the command wasn’t lawfull!

Anyhow the sight of the little helicopter just made it all the more fun for those below, we didn’t like to get to close because we might have been shot at.

I am not sure if it ever got taken to court as a legal reason if anyone got shot, seems to me it was an old law (eighteenth century or whatever) that wouldn’t stand up in modern times.

Eric

( Posted by: Fairplay [Member] On: September 19, 2007 )

"I've fallen & I can't get up!" ugh...shoot me already.

"I've fallen and I can't get up!"

That commercial used to drive me up the wall...I don't know what it was about it, perhaps it was the sound of the crying actresses voice (maybe the voice pitch irritated me?) or the fact that it seemed to be on ALL the time, but listening to it was like the sound of nails on the blackboard.

I reached a point where I wanted to kick the old lady on the floor! I began to hate her. (God forgive me) Horrible. Just horrible. I feel terrible about it, but that is what that commercial would do to me.

I remember that shortly after that commercial came out, there were several comedians who made fun of it, so I guess I wasn't the only one annoyed by the helpless, whiny, little old lady on the floor!?

Television commercials, argh!!! Hate them in general.

But, I do have a favorite television quote, though not really a quirk, but here it is just the same;

Sex on television can't hurt you unless you fall off. ~Author Unknown

( Posted by: TheRealKarmaTseringLhamo [Member] On: September 19, 2007 )

"Phil Dirt Wanted" Pen's Thread...
(Just remembered something that I used to wonder about as a child) When I would ride "Phil Dirt Wanted" Pen's thread..with my parents on our usual Sunday drives, I started noticing that there were signs here and there for a "FILL DIRT WANTED"...I wondered what it was that Phil had done and what he was wanted for. I noticed there were wanted signs in different towns for Phil. Somebody really wanted him bad. I wondered about Phil Dirt a lot.

( Posted by: TheRealKarmaTseringLhamo [Member] On: September 19, 2007 )

Phil Dirt...???
Sorry about that previous post comment, got copy all mangled, here goes another try;

(Just remembered something that I used to wonder about as a child) When I would ride with my parents on our usual Sunday drives, I started noticing that there were signs here and there for a "FILL DIRT WANTED"...I wondered what it was that Phil had done and what he was wanted for? I noticed there were wanted signs in different towns for Phil. Somebody really wanted him bad. I wondered about Phil Dirt a lot.

( Posted by: TheRealKarmaTseringLhamo [Member] On: September 19, 2007 )

sign language
heh! that reminded me about the time I went to a dance with my folks. The sign said - No Minors Allowed. I wondered how come miners weren't welcome at dances and wondered why anyone had bothered to exclude them (in writing) when there were no mines in Kitimat anyhow.

( Posted by: Penelope [Member] On: September 19, 2007 )

NO MINERS ALLOWED!
Hahahaha! I had such a great laugh with that one! Thanks.

( Posted by: TheRealKarmaTseringLhamo [Member] On: September 19, 2007 )

Quirk-izms
This brings two expressions to mind immediately-
The first is a Polish expression that always cracked me up- In Polish (I can't write it correctly) but it sounds like "Goop-ie-ya-zetta".

Translated, it means something like "You are a fool, who sits laughing at a piece of cheese."
I love that one!

The second is a southern colloqualism (Lucie, an "ism"...) "I'll bet ya dollars to donuts..."

I'd love for someone to explain that one to me!

- both always make me laugh! Hope they do you, too!

Elizabeth

( Posted by: emaks [Member] On: September 20, 2007 )

Quirk thread
I found some quirky sayings that attached themselves to me..

I am in shape-round is a shape

Time may be a healer-but it's a lousy beautician

I am a nutritional over achiever

Brain cell come and brain cells go-but fat cells live forever

Even if you are on the right track-you'll get run over if you just sit there

These hit home with me...Kacee

( Posted by: Nitz kitty [Member] On: September 20, 2007 )

Penelope's quirks
"take care now"

Huh? I was reminded of this last night watching Seinfeld.

( Posted by: desvelado [Member] On: September 20, 2007 )

quirks #2
When having lost, for example, one’s car keys/ wallet/ mind/ etc, and some bright spark will helpfully pipe up:

“It’s always in the last place you look.”

Yes! I f******g know that! It will always be in the last shagging place you look! Because after you’ve found it, you stop f*****g looking, don’t you?! What sort of idiot would you have to be to keep looking after you found it? For Christ’s sake!

( Posted by: AuldMiseryGuts [Member] On: September 21, 2007 )

quirks #3
"Have a nice day"... I don't know if this qualifies as a quirk, or why it irritates me so much... but it does. It might be the obvious insincerity with which its said, I don't know, but every time I hear it I want to scream: "Don't tell me what kind of f*****g day to have, arseholes!"...

though I'm willing to concede that one might just be me.

( Posted by: AuldMiseryGuts [Member] On: September 21, 2007 )

Possible Attruibution
Sex on television can't hurt you unless you fall off. ~Author Unknown
It sounds like a Woody Allen quote to me.

( Posted by: poeteye [Member] On: September 21, 2007 )

the "ostrich" quirk
As in anything that smacks of the head buried in sand syndrome. Couple of examples:

"It's an isolated incident". Uh-huh. Yeah. Sure. We are now at dozens of school shootings, many of them with fatalities. Yet they continue to be "isolated incidents". Gimme a break!

"We're in a transition period". How long is transition anyway? In the Quebec Health Care System, we been in a transition period for 25 years!

"We have to find creative solutions". That usually means there's no money to buy new supplies or to hire new personnel. IMO, the only "creative solution" in existence is nail polish remover. It permits me to creatively apply another colour.

Enough of this brain-dead crap!!!

( Posted by: windchime [Member] On: September 23, 2007 )

corporate quirk
oh yeah! What about the new and improved double speak of
down sizing instead of job losses?

( Posted by: Penelope [Member] On: September 24, 2007 )

"Outsourcing"? Corporate Speak....
Outsourcing? Is that one or two words? Yes, whatever... aren't corporate speak CEO sociopaths that come up with this BS jargon just a lovely bunch of vampires who are growing fatter off the blood profit of the "global economy" available to them via third world masses of slave labor...what a lovely word "Out-Sourcing".

Die you greedy corporate pigs! Die! DIE!!!

And, that is how I really feel about "corporate speak". Thanks for bringing it up, Lucie and Penelope.

( Posted by: TheRealKarmaTseringLhamo [Member] On: September 24, 2007 )

Company Policy
Isn’t it nice coming up against the brick wall of "It's Company Policy” usually because there is no other sane reason for an answer.

( Posted by: Fairplay [Member] On: September 24, 2007 )

quirk #4
yesterday heard "liberal interventionalism"- describing Britain's military presence in Iraq...

"collateral damage" is another favourite...

( Posted by: AuldMiseryGuts [Member] On: September 26, 2007 )

Ooh. Quirks!
In one of my (many) CPR/First Aid classes I've had to attend for my job...

When a person does not rouse or respond to a rescuer's attempts, they are considered 'unresponsive.'

When a person groans, murmurs incoherently or lolls about, dazed, the term is 'abnormally sleepy.'

Abnormally sleepy?

This is seriously medical jargon?

( Posted by: chinadoll [Member] On: September 26, 2007 )

one more quirk
Same difference.

Huh? Isn't that an oxymoron?

I have a feeling this thread can go on forever...

( Posted by: desvelado [Member] On: September 27, 2007 )

pet peeve of my mom
these ones and those ones ... she would go off on a rant everytime she heard it .. called it rampant verbiage. I still catch myself once in a while using it myself and cringe waiting for the slam that won't happen now.

( Posted by: Penelope [Member] On: September 27, 2007 )

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