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Drought they say,
so they
seeded the clouds to make rain,
and my heart detained in floodplain,
drowned, like I am now
a stranger
inside a crowded train.

A stray in this cliché
must I unsay
I don’t love anyway?
Not that the city
in an hour’s deluge makes me grey,
but yesterday,
it wasn’t like this at all, not in any way.

Touchy on slightly wet jackets
and a frenchkissing pair
who are likely to copulate
right here right now,
oh wow!
does a bedmate wait for me
at the end of this trip?

A stray in this cliché
I must unsay I hate PDA, duh
public display
of affectation, you know?
I can kiss a miss just for a show,
but no, the truth is I’d like a joe
- I mean coffee! loco!

So, Starbucks anyone?
I say, just for fun, let’s bunk,
because like Monday
I still don’t love anyway,
not even when they seeded the clouds
or plagiarized God
in any other way they can.

(Word of the Month: Plagiarize . . . Tee Hee!)

crystal face I kiss
tongue tastes like sweet cold rain
I fall into pond

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The following comments are for "They Seeded The Clouds"
by peterpaulino

Oh Lucie
You got me responding to comments on my poem, when you said 'touch ups', I'd love that! You know I love that, so please feel free to help me make this better :-). When I was writing this (that was last night), I imagine this as a scene from an MTV and AKON is the artist; a rapper wannabe I am in this poem hehe. There's puddles on the floor because of those people who ride the train with their wet umbrellas and jackets.

( Posted by: peterpaulino [Member] On: August 6, 2007 )

I love that word, and for me it sums up everything that's great about this poem, excessive, dramatic, exuberant, ebullient etc, etc and on and on...

this is interesting material too, and carried through with cinematic aplomb… encore, encore…

( Posted by: AuldMiseryGuts [Member] On: August 7, 2007 )

Depth Versus Humor
This combination of mindful depth and lighthearted humor is like none I have ever before seen. Your joke about coffee that comes directly after pondering the acceptability of PDA most certainly exudes personality.


( Posted by: ArsPoet2789ica [Member] On: August 7, 2007 )

affectation, deluge and coffee
Lucie, affectation it is then, a twist to PDA's meaning. Okay, I'll await that book, nope I don't know him yet, but soon won't I? Thank you very much for the thoughtfulness, here and there.

Shannon, thanks for the encore, love that word too, deluge. '-)

Aubri, geez, I like your comment, was worried I am rewriting something that's already been written many times before, well I did maybe, but I like that thing you said about the depth and humor here. Thank you very much.

Will soon rewrite this, maybe after a day or two.

( Posted by: peterpaulino [Member] On: August 8, 2007 )

PeterPaulino "plagiarized God"
Thank you for commenting on my "Freyja's Muse" today, what a wonderful surprise to find your comment there after so long a time since I last heard from you...remember what we spoke of personally, that is all true, email me, I have more to tell you, and discuss.

But anyway since your were so gracious to come to my post again, (reciprocity is what writers ALL want whether they admit it or not, me included, heeheehe!) I went back to see you last post and I was not there in comments? Odd that I missed it, hmmm? I must have been gone that week or something, but now I am here, and this I think Lucie's suggestion was an improvement, but like Shannon, I am one to focus in on a particular word or stanza, and deluge is indeed perfect., I also like the line: "plagiarized God"---Lucie will be back soon, she misses you too, you know that...come back to us, give us some more of that love...because your works and you indeed are so loved and missed here at the Lit.Org.

Namaste old friend,

( Posted by: TheRealKarmaTseringLhamo [Member] On: October 15, 2008 )

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