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woke up
sky blue, sun and
bare tree limbs.
during the day
clouds gather. walking,
see sky gray,
the wind inbetween houses.
working alone
until you got there
eyes meet, uneasy
all night thoughts and jokes.
wonder home restless and
unfulfilled,
sky dark, clouds purple.
Questions of rain.

------
someday could be today...





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The following comments are for "uneasy"
by ruina

uneasy
uneasy indeed, I think the stilted, almost fractured lines are well suited to the sense of awkwardness and uneasy portrayed here. a profound sense of alienation and loneliness here... the feeling of frustration in almost connecting... love the "Questions of rain" too... evocative piece, this, of a feeling familiar to most, I'm sure. thanks for this.

( Posted by: AuldMiseryGuts [Member] On: February 6, 2007 )

thank you, as well
yes, i'm glad what i was trying to portray came through.
thank you so much for your comments, they're always very insightful!

( Posted by: ruina [Member] On: February 6, 2007 )





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