Lit.Org - a community for readers and writers Advanced Search
 




Average Rating
0.00

(0 votes)

You must login to vote

Grey hair
He stared a shale shoreline,

the soothing grey waves,
like the static fizz from a radiogram.
Hearing
numbed faces cupped by our shaking wet hands,
shivering and freezing rain.



------
English was invented by Englishmen. Language is a male construct.Me site


Related Items

Comments

The following comments are for "On the beach"
by NascentPawn

wow!
Hey NascentPawn, this is one cool poem! I really connected with the images. The language is awesome, btw.

Michael

( Posted by: quill [Member] On: November 24, 2006 )

On the beach
Repetition worked well for this one. "Hearing whispers hissed by the freezing rain," was a great choice. I liked it.

( Posted by: chinadoll [Member] On: November 26, 2006 )





Add Your Comment

You Must be a member to post comments and ratings. If you are NOT already a member, signup now it only takes a few seconds!

All Fields are required

Commenting Guidelines:
  • All comments must be about the writing. Non-related comments will be deleted.
  • Flaming, derogatory or messages attacking other members well be deleted.
  • Adult/Sexual comments or messages will be deleted.
  • All subjects MUST be PG. No cursing in subjects.
  • All comments must follow the sites posting guidelines.
The purpose of commenting on Lit.Org is to help writers improve their writing. Please post constructive feedback to help the author improve their work.


Username:
Password:
Subject:
Comment:





Login:
Password: