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The newlyweds strolled down the street hand in hand, then arm in arm, and eventually arms around one another- his hand resting on her shoulder, hers hugging his waist. In the distant intersection ahead a shapely redhead crossed the otherwise deserted street.
“I’d like to see if her carpet matches the drapes,” said the groom.
“Don’t forget your vows,” his bride replied as her hand dropped to playfully pinch his ass. His hand left her shoulder to caress her cheek, then tickled her ear. She giggled. He then grasped her firmly under her chin and twisted her head to one side and backwards as he forced her body forward with one knee. He felt more than heard her spine snap, and let go. She may have retained consciousness long enough to feel the pain as her face struck the sidewalk- he hoped so.
“Until death do us part?” he inquired of her corpse.
He jogged to the intersection and turned the corner.
“Excuse me miss, but don’t I know you from somewhere?”
"A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds, adored by little statesman and philosophers and divines. With consistency a great soul has simply nothing to do."
- Ralph 'Where's Waldo' Emerson
"I don't know half of you half as well as I should like. And I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve."
- Bilbo Baggins