Lit.Org - a community for readers and writers Advanced Search

Average Rating

(0 votes)

You must login to vote

Before I was even born I was predestined to misery
Because an asp swallowed my soul
Snakes have lived among us since the beginning of time
And have hunted us down like hyenas with stealth
Twisting their posable scales around tall grasses
Bodies baking and eyes flaming with ferocity in the heat of day
Waiting to take away our dreams with a lightning strike

But for most people our snakes get us in our lives
When weíre born weíre innocent
But snakes kill us through our families
Cobras spit at us through our friends and our mates
The tightening of the grip of a boa
We never want to admit is our own mistakes weíve made

But in my case I find itís not true
No snakes have attacked me in this life
And I have not stood myself under the branch of a hog plum tree
Waiting for the venomous tree viper to do me in himself
No the asp got me before I was born

They say snakes are blind
And can feel movement through the rumbling of the ground
Well the asp left me blind like a snake
Feeling the world only through words I hear and memorize
Itís as if I crawl along the ground on a soft underbelly
And miss what is most obvious about a personís face and mind

The asp left me a snake without a soul
Is the soul nothing more than blinking of the eyes
Twisting of the mouth and feeling what turtles can feel
Or is there a reason why the snake got me first
Why I never discovered the things a two year old can understand
I remain pinned down like a garter snake under a t-bar
So I guess Iím not going to find out

Related Items


The following comments are for "How an asp swallowed my soul"
by claudita

Thief Of Souls
Good to see another poem from you. I remember an asp from a previous piece of yours.

I thought this poem didn't really pick up and get some poetic energy until the last 2 stanzas. The writing in the previous stanzas seemed too matter-of-fact and explanatory - too "prosey" or something - but the concept you are explaining has real fascination. There are a few lines I like in the earlier stanzas. For one: "Twisting their posable scales around tall grasses."

I always look forward to anything you post.

( Posted by: gomarsoap [Member] On: August 12, 2006 )

Add Your Comment

You Must be a member to post comments and ratings. If you are NOT already a member, signup now it only takes a few seconds!

All Fields are required

Commenting Guidelines:
  • All comments must be about the writing. Non-related comments will be deleted.
  • Flaming, derogatory or messages attacking other members well be deleted.
  • Adult/Sexual comments or messages will be deleted.
  • All subjects MUST be PG. No cursing in subjects.
  • All comments must follow the sites posting guidelines.
The purpose of commenting on Lit.Org is to help writers improve their writing. Please post constructive feedback to help the author improve their work.