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10chinadoll
9G.S.VASUKUMAR
8Unknownfreedom

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Ever the Pisces outliving the life that was due.

I cannot forget death while she's still taking sips of me. So modestly.

A vision that is bleeding will take the life out of you.

Her nipples and lips were the color of cigarette burns.

Our gasps were potent and humid,

like mushroom-damp exhalations from the marsh.

The sweat that slipped off our naked bodies became part of the swamp.

My slow-light shone throuth the orgasm to be forgotten,

in the darkness beyond.

I was left in the company of ghosts that wanted to be meat again.

She smiled like a polar night sky where every star had died.

Her whispering was a velvet lullabye,

where I could find comfort in losing my mind.

I layed on my back in the muck and was lost in the sky.

The moon was so bright i could feel its light in my bones.

Starlight was kissing my skin like ice.

I awoke, sticky and wet with dream sweat.




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Comments

The following comments are for "Dream Sweat"
by BAAL

Damn, Baal!
There's some terrific lusty imagery in here. Some truly inspired lines that make me think, "Dammit, why can't I have an experience like that?" Then I realize it's because you need to sleep to have these dreams, not stay up late drinking merlot and reading poetry. Though that's fun, too.

Best line: "I cannot forget death while she's still taking sips of me." Fucking brilliant.

( Posted by: viper9 [Member] On: August 7, 2006 )

Dream Sweat
think I liked almost every line of this. which is rare enough for me with anything. Feel punch-drunk now though. Or like I've just come out of heavy hypnosis or sedation. There should be a warning with these, like driving or operating heavy machinary, reading (not) to be attempted whilst drunk.

( Posted by: AuldMiseryGuts [Member] On: August 7, 2006 )

Dream sweat
You do have a habit of making people say "Damn" when they read your work. Sexy, provocative and still mysterious. Enjoyed as always!

Nae

( Posted by: nae411 [Member] On: August 7, 2006 )

Dangggg
I agree as well. damnnnn. I love it to pieces. As usual you give us just enough of everything!

( Posted by: thesadpoet [Member] On: August 11, 2006 )





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