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I guess you hadn’t meant
to leave the concert halfway through.
Although it’s the charm of the open-air
to unpedestal orchestras;
unpin fake bowties, demystify,
and scrawl on the score
an unscripted part
for a chorus of mosquitoes.

And although it’s true that grizzling kids
or shrilling phones
can be smuggled out of the park without ado:
noone will shush, or tut at you
if you tread in your haste
on a plate of potato salad
or a sleeping child…

I can only guess
you’d not have picked a spot so near the stage
if you didn’t trust your mammoth dog –
your hulking wooly St-Bernard-cross
to pick safe passage
out among the thick-set picnics.

It was thoughtful of you to carry him, then
clutched to your chest: a reluctant dancing partner
with all four legs a-drunken-kimbo,
liquid eyes and lolling tongue alike, a-roll
(the dog’s, that is
your eyes were merely bugged
and turning crimson
from strain, perhaps; embarrassment, or dog-smell)

And I swear there was far more vibrant life
in the mirth that followed your eccentric exit,
communal and joyful and unplanned,
than there was vibrant death
in all of Mozart’s requiem.

I do hope you’ll come back next week
to cart your dog across the lawn again.
I think they’re playing the 1812
and Ludwig, bless him, wasn’t much for laughs.

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The following comments are for "To the man at the Mozart"
by MobiusSoul

To the man at the Mozart
liked this because it set a scene and told a story with such vividness I could really picture it. The image of the dog like some big shaggy drunk or "a reluctant dancing partner" was made even better when you describe the spontaneous mirth it caused in the people there. Felt as if I could really hear them laughing, like a release of tension almost ten times as cathartic as the music.

First stanza was great too, there's just something particularly satisfying about the phrase "unpedestal orchestras", not sure what, there just is, just seemed like exactly the right way to tell it.

Thank you for making me laugh.


( Posted by: AuldMiseryGuts [Member] On: July 24, 2006 )

Dog days and soul food
Thanks for reading. And for laughing in the appropriate spirit. No great art intended here (or, indeed, committed). But I wrote on Gomar's recent thread that I liked partly because of the poems that make me laugh here... then, fearing that I'd been disappearing up own emotional a*s is recent posts, I figured I'd better try to write the talk.

This made me laugh in reality. It also made me reflect that I took more away from the laughter than from the music itself. And there's probably a better poem in that than the one I ended up writing...

( Posted by: MobiusSoul [Member] On: July 24, 2006 )

the man at the mozart
I enjoyed reading. thanks for this.

( Posted by: unseenwriterx [Member] On: July 24, 2006 )

Man at the Mozart
Mobius, this brought back the sweetest memories and made me smile all the way through it. When I first got married and prior to having my kids, hubby and I would frequent outdoor concerts. Jazz, classical anything we could take a blanket, a drink and cheese too. Half of the time I enjoyed people watching more than the music but it was the whole ambiance that really made me keep coming back. Thank you so much for taking me with you on this one. I truly enjoyed.


( Posted by: nae411 [Member] On: July 25, 2006 )

Eric, Nae, unseen - honoured...
... to stir up a few good memories. There's got to be good karma in that - I sure could use some at present. So good vibes back in return, kind people.

( Posted by: MobiusSoul [Member] On: July 26, 2006 )

Consider it very good karma. The thoughts stayed with me and made me smile on several occassions. I was thinking my hubby would enjoy this as well. Will share it with him tonight.

Sending you lots of wonderful thoughts,

( Posted by: nae411 [Member] On: July 26, 2006 )

All laughs
This poem - which I thought was flawless upon the first time reading it - just keeps getting better with each follow-up read. You have a superb writer's voice.

How thoughtful of him to carry the dog across the picnic strewn lawn, indeed!

( Posted by: chinadoll [Member] On: July 26, 2006 )

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