Lit.Org - a community for readers and writers Advanced Search
 




Average Rating
0.00

(0 votes)

You must login to vote

we love our step-daughters, we lick our bowls clean,
we wipe our slates and turn our cheeks.
we contact our pharmacies with the
entitlement cloud
surrounding our heads like tiny gnats
flying birds of egotism spawning
that unnecessary tone.

i picked this cuntry? i picked
you? i, the fucked soul of suburbia,
the mass among mobs oozing like molasses past
sixth avenue--
almost seventh.
i, the punctured amniotic sac, underdeveloped
and without lungs i picked i
picked you.

i get down on my knees like my memphis twin
and i pray i pray oh i
pray
i, the mantis, i eat my young.
in this cuntry we are clean, we are unseen
we are mean we are lean we are keen
we are correct we object we object we
object,

your honor.
i live and eat this cuntry
i fuck and walk this cuntry
i make and move this cuntry
in this cuntry we are clean
we are clean
we are clean.

------
mlw


Related Items

Comments

The following comments are for "In This C(o)untry"
by wally

inspired bile
I have to say, just reading the title of this poem reminded me of the Sex Pistols, Anarchy in the UK, with John Lydon's vocal, heavily emphasising the "cunt" in country, and I had a hard time getting past that, 'cause I kept wanting to sing your poem to the tune of Anarchy... Funny, how the mind does that. Anyway, I got over that eventually, and there were some bits I really liked. Basically the first stanza is great up until the last two lines. See, for me at least, all that egotism is already implied, you don't need to mention it directly. The second stanza I loved, the mob oozing like molasses, and the punctured amniotic sack. Those are great lines, they really set the tone of angry incredulous disbelief. Not so sure about the rapid fire mean, lean, keen rhyming, but that's just a personal thing, and generally I liked it a lot, anger's obviously a good inspiration for you wally, 'cause you make good use of it without letting it spill over in to vitriolic ranting, which is a hard thing to do.

( Posted by: AuldMiseryGuts [Member] On: June 28, 2006 )

I'm so punk rock
Thank you so much for your comments, I am flattered. I often write my poetry rather as lyrics or to be read beat-ly. I like me a rythym. I'm also one for rhyming and excessive alliteration, so I can understand how it gets old. I'm pleased you enjoyed it.

( Posted by: wally [Member] On: June 28, 2006 )





Add Your Comment

You Must be a member to post comments and ratings. If you are NOT already a member, signup now it only takes a few seconds!

All Fields are required

Commenting Guidelines:
  • All comments must be about the writing. Non-related comments will be deleted.
  • Flaming, derogatory or messages attacking other members well be deleted.
  • Adult/Sexual comments or messages will be deleted.
  • All subjects MUST be PG. No cursing in subjects.
  • All comments must follow the sites posting guidelines.
The purpose of commenting on Lit.Org is to help writers improve their writing. Please post constructive feedback to help the author improve their work.


Username:
Password:
Subject:
Comment:





Login:
Password: