Lit.Org - a community for readers and writers Advanced Search
 




Average Rating
0.00

(0 votes)

You must login to vote

She passed away in her sleep this morning. My sister is really broken up, and my father is heartbroken.

At least it didn't go on any longer. She was in horrific shape and getting worse, although she did have a real desire to live.

I will miss my mother but I believe she is now in a place with many people she knows. She was a clean-living woman with a big heart and a sharp eye, and a sharp tongue. She was also a mother who always knew where her kids were, and she was with her husband for 53 years. She was a real Irish character, but she never got to see her ancestral homeland. It is now even more important that I visit that place, if only for her.

One of the last things she asked of me, in the ICU, was to get a haircut. I did that tonight on South Street.

I have called in to the School District's HERBS system and logged the first two of my five allotted days of "Code 41: Period of Mourning for Close Relative." I logged it in before 5pm, I think, and the computer would have started calling registered substitute teachers to offer the two-day job to the first taker, going through english-certified subs first. That failing, the system will begin calling the pool of substitutes again at 6am tomorrow morning, and eventually someone, perhaps one of these people who barely speaks english but has been certified to teach here in Pennsylvania, will come in and watch the kids make an infernal mess of my classroom.

I don't care. I'm beyond caring at all about any of this. I could be fired or the school might take an asteroid hit and I just don't care.

There will never be anyone on the earth like this woman, and I owe so much of who and what I am to her. She was a fine wife to my father, and a fine mother to my sister, to me, and to a few other people. One of those people was an ingrate and a self-obsessed never-do-well but that's his fault, and his family's. Somehow it still disappoints me that I was unable to contact him to tell him what he really should know. She felt like he was her own child.

From my mother I get my intense love of animals, particularly cats. She loved her cats, although they were always vindictive, curmudgeonly crazy cats. Imagine a cat with a chainsaw-shelaighlaigh.

I'm sure I'll speak of my mother again from time to time. I'll try to get a picture of her to post here. She was a beautiful lady, and in fact she was still a beautiful lady, even in the ICU. Her hair remained raven-black even in her last days at 80 years of age.

------
The Alienist
jhfurnish@yahoo.com


Related Items

Comments

The following comments are for "My Mother Has Passed Away"
by The Alienist

Alienist, My condolences
I just read this and wanted you to know I am thinking of you, wishing you comfort. I know your mom is at peace now, it's what we wish for all our ailing elders.

It is good to take time from your work too, you need time to think of yourself, your close family and friends without having to spend yourself onto others that aren't so close.

Sure hope you are ok and let yourself cry, get it all out and hope you aren't alone, have someone to hold you. Please take care of yourself and rest.

Be well my friend,
Darlene

( Posted by: dareva [Member] On: May 18, 2006 )

Alienist
I am sorry for your loss.

williamhill

( Posted by: williamhill [Member] On: May 18, 2006 )

wrong thread
Alienist,

Sorry about your mother again-it's late.


Laura

( Posted by: macbeth [Member] On: May 19, 2006 )

Viper's loss...
my condolences...

Robert

( Posted by: rajengineer [Member] On: May 19, 2006 )

Thank you, everyone.
I appreciate all of your condolences.

My mother's viewing and funeral were wonderful; I must commend Earle Funeral Home and also my sister's parish Priest, Fr. Byerly at St. John's.

I do know that my mother is in a better place and watches me.

( Posted by: the alienist [Member] On: May 19, 2006 )

Alienist
Sorry to hear of the loss of your Mom...I feel your pain as I lost my Dad in 98...Remember the good times and celebrate her life...Kacee

( Posted by: Nitz Kitty [Member] On: May 19, 2006 )

loss
Comforting words elude me.

I can't claim that I feel your pain,
but I identify with it, as I have also felt it.

Surely God, after creating such a world of wonder and travail, has provided a place of peace where we may eventually join those so dear to us after tempering our souls in this troubled world. His design is clearly evident in such a wonderous universe.

I wish I could offer more than words on a screen.

I look forward to someday meeting your mom, as well as you, in the next world so clearly implied by the existence of this one.

I anticipate a most excellent party (but I'm not in a hurry).

Steve /aka drsoos

( Posted by: drsoos [Member] On: May 19, 2006 )

On the loss of your Mother
So dreadfully sorry to hear of your loss. I will pray for your family at this time.

( Posted by: The Demure 1 [Member] On: May 19, 2006 )

Joy
JH;
There is not much too say except, I will sit in silence and pray, I too back in 2001 lost my mom. But Joy comes when you remember what kind of Mother you had to set excellent values and examples by and live by them.


God will send a comforter!


{{{Jeannie}}}

( Posted by: JEANNIE45 [Member] On: May 19, 2006 )

Calm
For what it's worth, my condolences as well. To you and your family.

( Posted by: Viper9 [Member] On: May 19, 2006 )

Alienist
May God bless and protect your mother's soul. May she rest in peace. May God bring you comfort during this time of grief.

( Posted by: Ashmedai [Member] On: May 19, 2006 )

ALienist- blessings and comfort
Dear Mr. Alienist,
I was actually wanting to put the beautiful words I had found to honor my English teaher aunt when she died a few years ago. All I could get from my searches tonight was this, that I wrote for her. I believe in kizmit, and so I send these words to you- My heart is full for your pain, and hopefull for your long-lived joy that you had a mother who blessed your life...


How quiet kitchens become when death first enters a house. Then slowly, someone puts on a pot of coffee. Juice is poured. Bread set out. We must eat.

“Heddy loved this bread, but not the one with the raisins.”
“Can I get you something, Mary?”
“Yes, dear, I’ll have a slice of that bread, but not the one with raisins.”

The task of laying aside the daily conversations and concerns begins. Painfully, we remove the familiar. Abruptly we are forced to recognize that those footsteps will never be heard again. We strain to allow our ears to hear just one more time the key in the lock, the opening of the door, the arrival of the lost one, just once more. But it is not to be and so we put on our best suit and we wait for the heart to reattach itself to a daily routine.

best to you and may your mom have wings-

Elizabeth

( Posted by: emaks [Member] On: May 22, 2006 )

Alienist
Alienist,

When somebody very close dies a part of us dies with them, life seems futile in every respect, then slowly, very slowly we find they have not died but have connected with us and also live on in our sole.

My wife and I have lost our parents, and our daughter and there is no way to describe the grief that one must journey, but it shows the love and the care that is felt those who shared our lives.

You and your mother are now one, and I am not at all surprised by the phone call your sister recieved. Communication is sometimes difficult, but the closeness is not. I have posted below a letter found by by his wife after Cannon Holland's passing:

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Death is nothing at all. It does not count.
I have only slipped away into the next room.
Nothing has happened.
Everything remains exactly as it was.
I am I, and you are you, and the old life that we lived so fondly together is untouched, unchanged.
Whatever we were to each other, that we are still.
Call me by the old familiar name.
Speak of me in the easy way which you always used.
Put no difference into your tone.
Wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow.
Laugh as we always laughed at the little jokes that we enjoyed together.
Play, smile, think of me, pray for me.
Let my name be ever the household word that it always was.
Let it be spoken without an effort, without the ghost of a shadow upon it.
Life means all that it ever meant
It is the same as it ever was.
There is absolute and unbroken continuity.
What is this death but a negligible accident?
Why should I be out of mind because I am out of sight?
I am but waiting for you, for an interval, somewhere very near, just around the corner.
All is well. Nothing is hurt; nothing is lost.

One brief moment and all will be as it was before.
How we shall laugh at the trouble of parting when we meet again!'
So the face speaks. Surely while we speak there is a smile flitting over it; a smile as of gentle fun at the trick played us by seeming death...'
Henry Scott Holland (1847-1918)
Canon of St. Paul's Cathedral
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
As a spiritualist I have found this to be so true.......

Ivor

( Posted by: ivordavies [Member] On: May 23, 2006 )

Alienist,
Sorry about the spelling error (sole-soul) I always seem to make them when talking to teachers!

Just shows how much you are needed....

Ivor

( Posted by: ivordavies [Member] On: May 24, 2006 )

Thanks again, everyone.
We buried her urn Monday. Today is the last day of my bereavement leave and I go back to work tomorrow.

Hearing from everyone has been a great comfort, thanks to all!

( Posted by: The Alienist [Member] On: May 24, 2006 )

Passing
Just ran across your post. I never thought I would eventually contemplate your mother on this site. She sounds alot like my mother who passed away this past December - loved cats and cared for people.

Nothing I can say that hasn't been said better by the above individuals.

You simply must make that trip.

Best Regards,

Bob Phillips

( Posted by: gomarsoap [Member] On: July 3, 2006 )





Add Your Comment

You Must be a member to post comments and ratings. If you are NOT already a member, signup now it only takes a few seconds!

All Fields are required

Commenting Guidelines:
  • All comments must be about the writing. Non-related comments will be deleted.
  • Flaming, derogatory or messages attacking other members well be deleted.
  • Adult/Sexual comments or messages will be deleted.
  • All subjects MUST be PG. No cursing in subjects.
  • All comments must follow the sites posting guidelines.
The purpose of commenting on Lit.Org is to help writers improve their writing. Please post constructive feedback to help the author improve their work.


Username:
Password:
Subject:
Comment:





Login:
Password: