You must login to vote
How are you today?
The above phrase I cannot stand. It's too polite, it's too fake, it's not honest. By that I mean MY defintion of honest, verses the dictionary one. If you're going to start a conversation with a friend or others, cut to the chase. Perhaps I only say what I've just said because I like to speak my mind.
Sometimes it's so hard to speak that when I can, I'm happy about it/proud that I could speak, but I go back and think about things and I am mad.
And lately, I haven't been able to relax. Once I jump over one hurdle, I see another with my name written all over it.
And everything has been changing, my idea of things, even my feelings and everything else. It's as though I stand still while people pass.
School is almost over, less than 2 weeks left and it's all back to square one, alone for the whole summer. Maybe this is separation anxiety? Or am I just losing it? For the first time, I don't want school to end. All my friends are there, and I'll forget all their faces over three months.
I'm not even sure I still love the person that I've gone on and on about. I don't know if I'm to take drivers ed or summer school, or anything. My future is all up in the air.
I even feel lucky if I make it to the bus after school, I can't even see anything anymore.
Everything is changing, and I can't take it. All the people I know, me, my surroundings are just at the drop of a hat changing.
I'm so stressed I can't remember what day it is, and without trying, I give myself stomach aches. I'm sick. Thats all I can say for now.
I keep spacing out, I sit out P.E. to think things over in my head (which makes me feel even worse) and then I come home and wind myself up even tighter and then sleep it off.
I probably shouldn't be complaining, but I just needed to get this off my chest. It won't make me feel any better, tho.
Mad monkey fling poo!