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The road and stars above are calling me thrilling and brave.
In a way I already know, what they're trying to say.

my bedroom distilled through days of inactivity, to become a diarama,
cloaked in dust.

My family and friends disappear for months in a silo of dust,
in a fog
(not of war but)
of travel and tire-marked miles.
Feeding on and on and on
an endless odometer record stuck on repeat.

An on-again-and-off-again philosopher.
Never studying for exams.
Always studying the chalked outline of

And the biography of our chalked outlines
will hold words typed to tell a tale of journies,
"...we paid for every lesson that we learned."

"God grant me distraction."

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The following comments are for "Unhealthy Dialogue of Longing: Movement #1"
by Darkshine Raven

Unhealthy Dialogue of Longing: Movement #1
Some very good lines here-"my bedroom distilled through days of inactivity, to become a diarama,"
"Always studying the chalked outline of
everyone. "
As a whole, I feel the poem could use alittle condensing, perhaps increasing it`s effectiveness.
Tis is a minor crit-very good poem.

( Posted by: eliot [Member] On: February 24, 2006 )

"an on-again-and-off-again philosopher. never studying for exams." as far as i know, you've never met me, and yet you've painted my portrait. enjoyed the read. well done...

( Posted by: dmbrrphish7 [Member] On: February 27, 2006 )

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