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* another from my vault, penned in '76 at the age of 20



Falling


Did you hold the words we said, the smiles we shared?
I could mold my world to fit someone who cared,
but how could I give up the happiness I know
when youíre afraid to take my hand and let your feelings show?


My worldís my own now, I guess.
Somehow, my searching is less-
More realistic,
But thatís the way it goes.
I merely meant to caress.
- A drink to happiness!-
You saw it different,
But thatís the way it goes.

Donít those stars shining at night
make you feel part of it all?
And when is it wrong to try to touch
if even in the end you will fall?

------
Elizabeth Maksymiuk


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The following comments are for "Falling"
by emaks

emaks/ Unvaulted
Elizabeth- Isn't it cool to be able to 'touch' past this way? Dating everything, then, at chosen time: "unvaulting," lets us look at our own evolution, as well as allowing others a peek back, too..

Enjoyed. Reaching is good..

I almost referred to: "crypt." ("Crypto Knight")

"Vault" seem right.
B7L

( Posted by: Bobby7L [Member] On: December 6, 2005 )

B7L and treasure chests
Bobby, you always bring smiles. What a pleasant attribute. Yes, unvaulting is very sweet. What a trip to go back to that 'other' version of self. I find I can so readily step right back, upon reading some of these... and I have another excellant use. I have daughters who can see I was a younger version still trying to speak my own truth.
Thanks for inspiring me to post from vault, and yes (loudly) vault is better than 'crypt'!

wishing you joy and all good shit-
Elizabeth

( Posted by: emaks [Member] On: December 7, 2005 )

BTW JJDoe
I'm sorry I meant to say thanks to you too for taking the time to read and rate. appreciate it!

best-
E

( Posted by: emaks [Member] On: December 7, 2005 )

True to word: too true words
True to my word, visiting here, enjoying your too true words. You seem a straight-from-the-heart poet: no artifice, and the midsection of this one really caught in my throat. That so-sad sense of romantic ambition, pragmatically reined in. 'I wanted so much to love... but you said no. Tant pis.' I might've written this myself... and not aged 20, either :(

Somehow, rhythmically, I wanted the last line to read 'And is it wrong to try to touch/even if you know that you will fall'. Just meddling.

( Posted by: MobiusSoul [Member] On: December 7, 2005 )

Falling
Emaks;
You wrote this with your heart and soul. Awesome! and so touching! Thank you for such a beautiful poem.


Blessings,
{{{Jeannie}}}

( Posted by: JEANNIE45 [Member] On: December 7, 2005 )

Mobius and Jeannie
Sorry for my tardy response. I appreciate your taking time to read and comment.

This penned many years ago, actually used to have music to it. (I was poet, friend was musician who put my poetry to tune-) The vault is a wealth of useless information about me, but I find it very satisfying to go back to the wide-eyed girl and trace steps to where I am now. (still, mostly, wide-eyed; -girl part questinable as age precludes that discrtiption. Hope honey doesn't agree.)
I've written fact based poetry and thoughts for thirty-some years- It can still be very enlightening. Funny, too, to go back to a former self and re-evaluate the intensities of such emotions. "Live and learn" is such a true statement!
thanks for your time with me. It is appreciated-
Elizabeth

( Posted by: emaks [Member] On: December 12, 2005 )





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