STONE AGE HEADLINE NEWS
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With all of the disastrous stories in the news today, let’s take a look back on what might have been headline newsmakers a few thousand years ago. Is life so different after all?
T-REX DEVOURS HUNTING PARTY
This morning an entire hunting party, save one, from the Saber Clan was caught off guard by a T-Rex, himself hunting, near Deer Crossing Stream. One lone hunter managed to escape unharmed and returned to the cave to report the slaughter. This is the third reported incident this month and has local clans distressed at the loss of hunters and fearing to leave the safety of their caves…
FORTY FEARED DEAD AFTER FLASH FLOOD AT WASHING CREEK
It was a disastrous end to wash day for forty women when they were suddenly overtaken by floodwaters. Women from five caves of the Wolf Clan perished, as they were about to leave Washing Creek. Warning cries were not heard from the rocks above as floodwaters rushed down the creek, sweeping the women away and into the Mighty River downstream. All are feared dead…
BATTLE BETWEEN FOX AND OWL CLANS CONTINUE
Fighting continues today between two long rival clans, the Fox and Owl. It is reported that the Owl Clan set fire to the Fox camp as they slept, killing six clan members and injuring nine. “When will it all end?” asked one Fox Clan elder. “The violence seems to go on. Do we even remember why we fight?” That seems to be the question on all lips. Just why are we killing one another?
EARTH SHAKES CAVES, BURYING DOZENS
Last night’s earth shake destroyed the homes of several Clans. It is reported that as many as fifty may be dead as their caves collapsed upon them while they slept. Only a few survived as they managed to escape out of the mouth of the caves. The survivors are said to have been guarding the caves from animals when the shake began…
HUNDREDS DYING OF STARVATION DUE TO DROUGHT
Hundreds from many clans are scraping the last of stored corn from last harvest. Four moons with no rain and the scorching of the sun is blamed for the withering of crops in the field. This will mean death unless the rains come and a second crop survives the pillaging of insects and starving animals. At this time food is being rationed for only the strongest of clansmen…
WATERING STREAM YIELDS SICKNESS, OVER-THE-MOUNTAIN MEN BLAMED
Several neighboring clans that share the water from Watering Stream have succumbed to a strange illness. After a small group of men investigated upstream, it was discovered that more than twenty dead animals’ bodies were held by vines in the water. The spear from an Over-The-Mountain man was found by water’s edge, indicating that the animals were placed there to make the Clans downstream ill. “This is an act of war”, declares a Clansman. “We will retaliate!” he shouts, while other men pound their chests in agreement…
SMOKING MOUNTAIN SPITS RIVERS OF FIRE OVER VILLAGE
Villagers in Grass Hut Clan flee before rivers of fire running down Smoking Mountain. Many elders were not swift enough to escape. Survivors question why the mountain became angry and search for answers among themselves and with the holy shaman. “We will banish the one who is responsible for the angering of the mountain. All villagers will be examined closely,” announced one surviving elder…
ICE COVERING HUNTING GROUNDS TO NORTH
Several members of the hunting party from the Shaggy Bear Clan returned with empty hands after reporting an enormous field of ice covered where they have hunted the mighty mammoth since the days of their ancestors. Some question their story and believe they are being lazy and do not want to contribute to the Clan’s food supply for the coming winter. “The story is ridiculous,” declares one seasoned hunter from a neighboring Clan. “Why would there be a field of ice in the hunting ground?” A local toolmaker still wonders if this could be a sign of the end. Another hunting party will be sent out tomorrow to continue the mammoth hunt…
FLYING STAR WITH TAIL LIGHTS NIGHT SKY
All that witnessed the flying star with a tail fell to the ground with fear. No one seems to know what it is or what it means. A meeting of the shaman was ordered the next morning to discuss this event and to discern it’s meaning. It is reported that the sky to the west is glowing like the sunset day and night. Birds and land animals are fleeing to the east. Is this another sign that the end is at hand?
This article is purely fiction. Any similarity to persons living or dead is coincidental.