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With events moving linear
I spin in circles
Until everything and nothing
are blurred
around the edges
Softening the blow

I forget the space he existed in
I beat myself for it
How could I do that to him

I take it all apart
trying to find what makes it tick
Maybe then I can stop the pain
I break it all down
it'll never be the same, never seem real to me

I forget the space he existed in
I beat myself for it
How could I do that to him

I find beauty in the tragedy
humour in denial
i tried so hard to capture it all,
With omosis I press the meaning
out of some book but I couldnt
it slipped away

I remember the saturday of warmth
as I unfurled and curled on the floor
I didn't want to believe the truth,
I didn't want to swallow it whole
allow it to digest
I tried my best but again I failed

I smoked until my lungs went black
I cried until my face went numb
I knew, deep down,
nothing would ever be right again,
if it ever was to begin with

I forget the space he existed in
I beat myself for it
How could I do that to him

The voice on the other line
Told me he was dead
He hung himself friday night
I tore my hands through my hair
trying to remember
Where was I

Where was I the exact second
he tied the knot
where was i when he let it all go.
I was standing not two blocks
Laughing, Talking, trying to decide
On a movie to see that night

I was drowning in my own little life
while he swung from the rafters.
sometimes i wonder.....
sometimes i just wonder....

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The following comments are for "Something I want everyone to read..."
by David_Loren

this made me hurt - where are we all?

( Posted by: poesandpoetry [Member] On: January 8, 2004 )

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