Lit.Org - a community for readers and writers Advanced Search
 




Average Rating
10

(1 votes)


RatingRated by
10Charmr

You must login to vote

Did you ever watch a beetle
crawling on the ground?
no one hears him motoring;
making his important rounds.

If he could speak to you
I'm certain he would stop,
he'd nod his beetle head
while sitting on a rock.

He would tell you of his travels
all around your yard,
he could chat about your flowers
and about all the stars.

His world is a big place
and filled with wonderous things,
yes, he is a unique creature
more so than he seems.


------
I read your poems
rich and sweet
then lay roses at
your feet.

Char


Related Items

Comments

The following comments are for "A Beetle"
by Char

Char's Beetles, GOOD!!
I am SO glad you submitted this in Lit. This is one of the favorites of the kids Char. Along with your others, but this one is so charming, that the kids do their own actions to this...and have this one memorized.

Thanks for sharing this with everyone, it is so GOOD!

Dar x0

( Posted by: Dareva [Member] On: June 15, 2005 )

If you have Kids, grandkids, read this
to them.

Char sent this to my foster kids a couple of years ago.........and they love it. Char has become their favorite adopted "Auntie" and really enjoy this poem of hers.

Children love music and this takes on its own music, beat and actions.
Darlene

( Posted by: Dareva [Member] On: June 15, 2005 )

"A Beetle"
This would make Alexander very proud! As for me, I like this one almost as well as "My Walk" which, I hope will be forthcoming soooon! Love, Fernando

( Posted by: Charmr [Member] On: June 15, 2005 )

P S
I am not totally convinced that this one and "my Walk" are necessarily childrens pieces though. It seems to me that adults would enjoy them as much if not more. Any opinions out there?

( Posted by: Charmr [Member] On: June 15, 2005 )

Thanks
Thanks Dar, for commenting. I am glad the kids like this poem so well.

And Romay, thank you too for the nice compliments. I am wild about Alexander and his beetle house. LOL!!! :)

Always,
Char

( Posted by: Char [Member] On: June 15, 2005 )

A Beetle's Wondrous World
Char- I like your microcosmic story...Made me smile..

Not just for kids...

Robert William

( Posted by: Bobby7L [Member] On: June 15, 2005 )

Definately NOT just for kids...
I should have explained that I enjoy this just as much, if not more. YES CHAR, we are waiting for Alexander AND My Walk.......

NO ONE could convince me they are JUST FOR KIDS.....its the way you write....entertaining, wonderful stories...

Dar

( Posted by: Dareva [Member] On: June 15, 2005 )

Thank You
Bobby and Dar. I am very happy you like my poem. I have an affection for beetles due to Melanie's song, "Alexander Beetle." So, I tried to take a closer look. I do have some other poems for kids and even more in progress. I appreciate everyones time on this as I have never posted children's poetry. :)

Always,
Char

( Posted by: Char [Member] On: June 15, 2005 )

beetle-mania
Okay, I promise I won't stomp on them anymore since you put it that way. I wonder if he's met the caterpillar on the toadstool?

I never think of beetles as nice. I think with the shells that they must be self-sheltered grouchy snapping-turtle-like insects just waiting to pee on me. Also, if I try to pick them up they usually (for all their armour) squirt.

Poor things. I shall leave them bee.

Lans

( Posted by: GibsonGirl [Member] On: June 15, 2005 )

Thank You...
Gibsongirl for your comment. Lol, maybe beneath that armour and temperment beats the heart of a knowledgeable fellow...who knows?

Always,
Char

( Posted by: Char [Member] On: June 16, 2005 )

To be a beetle.
Nice little piece. The only line that threw me off was, 'and about all the stars.'. The placement of 'about' before 'all' makes this jarring, and since this was written for children, I'd go for flow.

But it makes you think, like Ben Wallace said (Lans - you cannot change your avatar anymore, because if you do, this comment won't make sense :P). Beetles beautiful? Gregor might have something to say about that!

Cheers!

Drew

( Posted by: strangedaze [Member] On: June 18, 2005 )





Add Your Comment

You Must be a member to post comments and ratings. If you are NOT already a member, signup now it only takes a few seconds!

All Fields are required

Commenting Guidelines:
  • All comments must be about the writing. Non-related comments will be deleted.
  • Flaming, derogatory or messages attacking other members well be deleted.
  • Adult/Sexual comments or messages will be deleted.
  • All subjects MUST be PG. No cursing in subjects.
  • All comments must follow the sites posting guidelines.
The purpose of commenting on Lit.Org is to help writers improve their writing. Please post constructive feedback to help the author improve their work.


Username:
Password:
Subject:
Comment:





Login:
Password: