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to the tune of (like a) Hurricane- Neil Young
Once I thought I saw you
in a dim and smoky bar
I covered my ass while running for my car
You are but a reamer
and mine's the butt you ream
You are like sand in my Vaseline
You are like a hemorrhoid
Pain in my third eye
Sphincter raw and inflamed
You're like a wet fart I can't wipe away
I think my colon's gonna blow today
I know that's just a song fragment so here's another somewhat dated song fragment- BONUS SONG FRAGMENT 90's FLASHBACK!
This is the story of a whore
She blew the president but not Al Gore
'Though she looks so fat in photographs
she's a natural humidor
when she squats
"A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds, adored by little statesman and philosophers and divines. With consistency a great soul has simply nothing to do."
- Ralph 'Where's Waldo' Emerson
"I don't know half of you half as well as I should like. And I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve."
- Bilbo Baggins