A Waste of Time
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When he first came up with the idea I thought he was joking.
“You’re not going to do that mate, it’s a stupid idea, it’s a fucking waste of time.”
“It’s not a fucking waste of time,” Hamish said back. “I’m going to do it, you just watch me.”
“Think of your family Hamish,” I said. “Think about them, think about your fucking life Hamish, think about what you’ve got to lose.” My voice was beginning to quiver as I spoke, ”think about your fucking friends here Hamish.”
Only then did Hamish stop. He stopped and thought about it and then I guess he saw reason because for a while he sat down and didn’t talk about it.
For my part, I thought I’d seen the end of it and I was ready to refer to it as a ‘stage’ he was going through.
But then later he started up again, saying how he was going to do it once and for all and how no one would care.
“People will care!” I said, “I can’t believe you’re even bringing that shit back up again!”
“Maybe so,” he retorted, “but at least I’ve got the guts to do it!”
“There’s no guts about it,” I said quieting down, usually the best way to treat these situations is through passive affirmation, let them know gently that their ideas are ridiculous.
Hamish brought his hand to his mouth and I didn’t like it. It showed that he was thinking, not a good sign for those on the edge.
“Listen to me mate, “there is absolutely, unequivocally, unmistakably no good that can come out of what you’re saying.”
I knew there was little else I could do. I’d done my part but even as he looked up at me, I knew I had failed.
“I’m sorry,” he said gravely as he got up from his seat. “I’m going to do it and there’s nothing you or anyone else on this goddamn planet can do about it!”
“Don’t be stupid,” I called out as he started to walk away from me, “it’s a waste of fucking time.”
“I don’t care!” Hamish repeated back over his shoulder, “I’ve got to do it! I’ve got to write it down!”
I may be stupid but at least I'm not handsome.