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with a flick of the wrist
and the blink of an eye
in less than an instant
i went flying through the sky

with the grace of a sphinx
and the speed of a fly
with the mind of a lynx
i will be your demise

my wings spread lik a dragons
i descend form the sky
in less than an instant
you're caught by surprise

but now, at last, i ask you
"waht the heck am i?"
"am i a dragon?"
"or am i a mind?"

please read my stuff and rate or comment on it

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The following comments are for "What am I"
by MortalAngel

Hi MortalAngel.

I like this riddle though I cannot solve it. Watch your typos though.

( Posted by: maimai [Member] On: May 12, 2005 )

sorry was in a hurry to type it i had a minute left to finish it

( Posted by: MortalAngel [Member] On: May 12, 2005 )

if you are reading this i know there are typos again i am sorry

( Posted by: MortalAngel [Member] On: May 12, 2005 )

no apologies necessary
we all make typos, really. ;)
just remember not to send your poems with typos when sending to publishers... unless the typos were meant to be there

( Posted by: maimai [Member] On: May 13, 2005 )

if it wasn't that you screwed up on your spelling this would be a pretty cool poem man! still cool I guess.

( Posted by: ZonerZone [Member] On: May 20, 2005 )

What am I?
Curious poem MortalAngel, I like dragons and I like the ambiguities I take from this.

"I went flying through the sky"
I would omit 'flying' to give better rhythm.

"my wings spread like a dragons"
I would change to: my wings spread like dragons' OR my wings spread like fire.
I think there is one too many syllables in this line and if it is indeed a dragon (I'm probably misunderstanding it) you would use a simile comparing it with another dragon.

But now at last I ask you
"What the hell am I?"
"Am I a dragon?"
"Or am I your mind?"
I've changed heck to hell because it's a stronger word and keeps with the image of fire and dragons and I changed 'a mind' to 'your mind' personalising it to the reader.

Anyway, by all means delete these suggestions and put them down to the ramblings of an idiot.

Nice write.


( Posted by: Emlyn [Member] On: May 20, 2005 )

its not a dragon its supposed to be a mind it represents imagination

( Posted by: MortalAngel [Member] On: May 24, 2005 )

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