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I guess not...

Your head lay back on a dirty pillow
Cheeks turned to flab arms turned to jello
Spiders came from the cracks
To say their hellos

Mould grew straight through the thickly wound gauze
The wasps they knew of your rotting bed sores
The muck caked to your shoes
It clogged up your pores

Divinity aged and died while you lazed
The vines spread their spines beneath where you stayed
Weren't you were going outside
I guess not today

Cellulite ruined your glacier life
Blue became red black became white
Your eyes stood still
In their shrunken sockets
But it was alright

Paint chips
Metal grips
Hospitals will make you sick

Naughty girls will make you trip

Alex, The boy full of ideas

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The following comments are for "I guess not..."
by amusedlilboy

It sort of grossed me out at the beginning with all those images of things rotting and decaying, but as i read it through i began to understand what it was about. Difficult to read, but definitely a well-written poem.


( Posted by: quill [Member] On: April 28, 2005 )

Great Descriptions
The poem flowed very well but I was having a little bit of trouble with the line:

Weren't you were going outside today
Translates into: were not you were

Maybe you should try and rewrite it somehow.

( Posted by: DJ [Member] On: April 29, 2005 )

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