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I've worn brand new yellow shoes as my Polish great grandmother pulled me along,
Velcro sandals on far off sands,
vomit splattered Airwalks in assorted airports,
desert afternoon blue Sambas on the tennis court,
borrowed water-proof work boots while we built Rainier's "Wonderland Trail,"
Shiny black England made loafers at University art parties,
and I just got my third pair of Vans(they work well with orthotics,)
not regaled with dragons like the first,
or a subtle tan like the second,
but a breathing black and grey with civilizing streaks of maroon.

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The following comments are for "A Shoe Story"
by seanspacey

Shoe energy
I really like this poem. In its brevity it informs on many levels - family, job history, foot problems, and so on. I particularly liked the line "vomit splattered Airwalks in assorted airports", which conveys yet another type of history.

For your consideration: How about "English made", or "English-made", instead of "England made"?

Also, the orthotics line might look better if given its own seperate line and maybe the comma outside of the parenthesis.

At first, the ending seemed abrupt, now it's okay with me, as if the speaker is saying, "Hey, it's about shoes - who knows where these may lead me."

I really like the poems that you post under Rants. They have bursts of energy that is most appealing - as if they have their own special place in relation to your other posts.

( Posted by: gomarsoap [Member] On: April 26, 2005 )

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