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I need AEM access –
A portal through which to withdraw
A small portion of the power of the universe
Set aside in my name.
Surely I have an account in good standing!
Is there an automated phone system
Or a secure, encrypted web site
Where I can check my balance?

My energy on hand has been depleted –
Conflicts have swirled around me
And anxieties about "issues."
Not even my own battles!
I wasn’t supposed to get stuck with the bill,
So how did I end up paying so dearly?
I reached into my pocket for the inner resources
To do my own thing,
And I came up empty –
Not even receipts to show how it was all spent.

How handy it would be to have an AEM
At my local convenience store!
I could stock up when I stop for coffee and the Sunday paper!
(I am wary of the artificial "energy" they sell
In slender silver cans.)

A mere plastic card with a magnetic strip
Seems an inadequate talisman
And a four-digit PIN an insufficient invocation
For tapping into primal power from its source.
Biometrics may be in order:
By all means, read my fingerprint. Scan my iris.
Satisfy yourself that it’s really me,
And I will utter any incantation you require.

"Select transaction." Withdrawal.
"Select account." Creativity.
"Select sub-account." Literary.
"Please indicate amount in multiples of poetry."
Just one poem would satisfy me today, thank you.

Hummmmmm…..
Whirrrrrrrrrrrrr…..





"Your transaction cannot be completed at this time."

Shit. Must be insufficient funds.
Is there a branch office I can visit on Monday
Too see if I have good enough credit
For a loan?

------
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana. - Groucho Marx



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Comments

The following comments are for "Automatic Energy Machine (AEM)"
by LinnieRed

Tapped out

Maybe somebody swiped mine.

Your humorous account earned my interest.

Little silver cans- gives me runs, not wings (can't fly if you're sitting).

( Posted by: drsoos [Member] On: April 24, 2005 )

Dem - This is what you get...
when:

A. You work for a credit union for five years, where ATMs are a daily topic of conversation, and,

2. You lie in bed on a cold, dreary April Saturday, half-thinking, "Geez, I wish I werent so tired....Wish I could get some writing done....Haven't posted anything but comments on Lit for weeks....Oh yeah - Gotta go get some cash later....Hey! Wouldn't it be cool if you could...?"

I think my brain is just wired funny. It makes the weirdest damn connections sometimes.

Thanks so much for your always-generous praise! Nothing peps up a fatigued, writer's-blocked writer as effectively as having someone use the "G" word when reacting to your work! Pshucks! You're making me blush! Don't! Stop! Don't stop! ; )

( Posted by: LinnieRed [Member] On: April 24, 2005 )

soos - "Energy" crisis
I KNEW those so-called "energy" drinks weren't fit for human consumption! I have to watch my caffeine intake, so those things scare the shit out of me! (You too, apparently!)

Of course, Tom & I have bought cases of such a concoction called "Whoop Ass" and handed cans out as gag party favors. However, we usually warn the recipients that the contents are NOT to be taken internally!

( Posted by: LinnieRed [Member] On: April 24, 2005 )





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